Fleshbot: straight, bad ideas

Zivity To Add Men, Stay Lame

Lux Alptraum — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 15:30:01 EDT

So, Zivity...you've just lost most of your funding and a good deal of your staff. How are you going to make it through this bitter economic downturn?

What's that? You say you're going to start featuring men on your pinup site? To make the ladies happy? Only they're not actually going to be naked—just in their underpants (or even fully clothed, if that's how they roll). Well, um...that's one strategy for success.

...maybe someone can give you another few million just because?

· Nominate a Zividude (zivity.com)

AIDS Is Bad. Just Like Hitler Having Sex.

Lux Alptraum — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 16:30:01 EDT

Today in unfortunate safer sex advertising: Germany's das comitee produced a set of posters determined to remind people of the seriousness of HIV...by comparing the virus to Hitler, Stalin, and Saddam Hussein banging hot chicks. Right, that makes sense.

And to keep it really classy, there's even a fake Hitler sex tape TV commercial (above). Well, no one can accuse them of being uncreative!

· Evildoers Doing It To Promote World AIDS Day (animalnewyork.com)
· AIDS Is A Mass Murderer (aids-is-a-mass-murderer.com)

Sexlets: The Gum That Lets You Sex

Lux Alptraum — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 12:30:01 EDT

Pills require a prescription, and those sketchy packets of bodega "male enhancer" are just, well, sketchy. So why not source your erection enhancing needs out to a chewing gum? A sexy chewing gum, that is.

Sexlets Gum—differentiated from other gums by the sexy lady on the package—is chock full of "a proprietary blend of natural male stimulating ingredients," which are apparently released into the bloodstream when the gum is chewed (mm, delicious!). When that happens, the blood starts aflowin', which leads to a larger, thicker penis and longer, harder, firmer and more powerful erections.

But that's not all! Since chewing gum promotes saliva, which kills bacteria, Sexlets Gum also helps maintain those bright shiny teeth and gums. Bigger penis and healthy teeth? Whatta combo!

Clearly, nothing can go wrong with this plan.

· Sexlets Gum (sexletsgum.com)

Reality Show Seeks Escort For Non-Exploitative Good Time

Lux Alptraum — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 16:30:10 EST

Call girls (or escorts, if you prefer) are notoriously private people, who generally prefer to stay off the radar as they pursue the glorious, age old career of exchanging sex and companionship for money. Reality shows, on the other hand, are fundamentally about being on the radar and exploiting the intimate details of your private life for financial gain. We're not sure what you'd call a bizarro world where those two things come together. Oh wait, no, we do know: Hollywood. (reversecowgirlblog.blogspot.com, thumbnail star via Ask Jolene)

How Not To Run A Sex Blog

Lux Alptraum — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 15:00:00 EST

There's a couple of ways to make a successful blog. You can create a blog that features content people really want to see (like, say, porn)—and this can be content you create yourself, or, if you're not so talented, it can be content you find somewhere (most likely on the internet). You can also create one of those submissions driven blogs, like Post Secret or Postcards From Yo Momma—although to get the ball rolling on one of these, you'll probably have to seed it with some entries of your own.

What you shouldn't do, however, is put together a blog with a popular, though not particularly original, content concept (lesbian sex videos!) and then try to source the content collection out to your currently nonexistent audience. To the great minds behind the Send Me Lesbian Videos blog: sorry, this is a total fail. If you want to just sit back and have other people look for porn for you, read Fleshbot, and leave the blog writing to the professionals. But hey, just to show we still like you, we'll hook you up with a free lesbian video, right here.

. . .

Wet hot lesbians pussy licking (pornhub.com)

· Send Me Lesbian Videos (sendmelesbianvideos.blogspot.com)
· Hot lesbian thumbnail from "Bree and Sasha"

Vibrator/Shaver Mixes Pleasure With Pain

Lux Alptraum — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 11:25:10 EDT

Some women like to shave their sensitive areas. And most women like vibrations on their sensitive areas. So why not save some time and effort and combine a shaver and a vibrator into one convenient package? That was probably the idea behind the Touche Womaniser Shaver and Silicone Massager, but whoever invented it needs to go straight back to the drawing board. Some things are kept separate for a reason, you know. (lovehoney.co.uk, via inventorspot.com)