Its contents may be long past the point of being safely confined to that storage locker, but that didn't stop certain parties concerned about the unbesmirched public image of America's favorite heiress-next-door from taking legal action to shut down ParisExposed.com, which despite our repeated attempts to access it over the weekend (=twice) seems to have been knocked offline*—thus depriving legions of curious suckers fans who ponied up the $39.97 subscription fee their credit card-given right to peruse further video clips of Paris' love nubbins and fat dudes covered in mountains of cocaine on a monthly basis.* Chief among Paris' champions is "Girls Gone Wild" czar and acknowledged compass of moral rectitude Joe Francis, who expressed his deep personal pain in a New York Post interview last Friday: "We're pissed and I feel for Paris right now. She's been victimized yet again ... These guys have absolutely no right to use the images, they flat-out put them on the Web with no permission. He messed with the wrong person." Given Mr. Francis' eminent authority when it comes to defending the honor of young women everywhere, we have no choice but to respect his position and promise to put the whole sordid manner behind us as we wish Paris all the best for a bright, wholesome tomorrow. After all, it's not like all those Google caches are going to stay around forever, you know.

· "'DEVASTATED' HEIRHEAD AND EX WILL SUE" (NY Post)
· "Paris Hilton and Joe Francis in Legal Fight to Take Down parisexposed.com" (hollywoodgrind.com - thanks Rick)
· See also: "I am - More Paris Exposed Shit of the Day" (drunkenstepfather.com)

*Update According to a "members newsletter" forwarded to us by a Fleshbot operative, the folks at ParisExposed.com have been busy doing some houskeeping of their own: "We spent the last few hours upgrading our networks and increasing our bandwidth and speed. We have just completed our system updates and our site is up and running ... faster than ever! Please visit http://85.17.61.101 to LOGIN and ACCESS your account." Guess that means Paris will be staying besmirched for at least a little while longer.

Previously: Update: Paris Hilton Still Exposed, Paris (Over)Exposed, Again

As we predicted, it didn't take long for clips from the recently launched ParisExposed.com to start appearing (and already getting pulled from) file sharing sites like RapidShare, though it's a testament to the increasing convenience with which these sorts of things are passed around that it took less than 24 hours for them to make the jump from paysite property to common currency instead of the week or so we had to suffer through back in 2003 when the sight of Paris' boobs was something new and exciting.

From what we've seen so far—a cache of eight clips from the members' area of ParisExposed.com—the savvy marketing geniuses at the site seem to be meting out the content in dribs and drabs: all that's apparently available so far are a couple of videos of Paris flashing her bits hither and yon as well as a longer clip of Paris and then boyfriend Jason Shaw rolling around toplessly in bed, during which time Paris shows off a necklace proclaiming her to be Jason's property (did that wind up in the storage facility as well?) and demonstrates her already lauded tampon-smoking skills. No hardcore action to speak of, and nothing we haven't really seen before. So is it worth spending that $39.97 to see whether things get more interesting? Possibly. But it also doesn't look like we'll have to.

· ParisExposed.com: "Bed Buddy" and "Bath" Screencaps (Fleshbot Gallery)
· Paris (Over)Exposed Again (Fleshbot)

It's like 2003 all over again (or maybe 2005; we tend to lose track of these things): Yesterday saw the launch of ParisExposed.com, a website which, yes, exposes the contents of a $208 a month storage facility which the Hilton family coffers somehow forgot to pay for and which yielded a trove of miscellania that someone apparently thinks is worth charging visitors $39.97 to see, including Paris' old passports, correspondence, and home videos in which she shows cooch-flashers-come-lately like Britney Spears the real way to stay in the public eye once your notoriety has started to dim. So if you can't get enough of the sight of Paris getting her boob licked or her and her friends smoking weed and allegedly snorting a kilo of coke off a naked dude's torso, you may want to consider ponying up for the privilege; hopefully you'll have better luck accessing the members' area of the site than we did. (Or we can all just wait another few days for the contents to start appearing via the usual venues on the interweb, which we'll do our best to keep you updated about here. After all, we've waited this long.)

· Paris Exposed (membership tour @ parisexposed.com; see also preview video @ retroskank.com)

Previously: Paris Hilton's Sidekick Photos, Paris Steals "Paris", Paris Buys "Paris", "1 Night In Paris" Review, PHST: The Saga Continues

"Hey Britney," we can imagine Paris Hilton leaning in and slurring through a fragrant haze of Stoli and Red Bull and expensive Bolivian stimulants into her new best friend's ear, "The sex tape rumour thing was genius; it's really cool that people are starting to pay attention to you again, and no one knows better than I do how not wearing panties and climbing into the back of a limo can really drive those blogger kids wild! But next time, try not to be so obvious, k? You don't want to give too much away so quickly—and besides, girl, those scars ain't pretty. Save it for your next honeymoon tape or something. What time are we picking up Lindsay tonight again?"

· " Britney Spears Did it AGAIN Last Night" (idontlikeyouinthatway.com)
· See also: "The Spears/Hilton Friendship: The Developmental Impact On Neglected Offspring" (Defamer)

Previously: Britney Spears Upskirt Photos: No, Really, Yet Another Britney Spears Upskirt, Britney Spears Upskirt, The Britney Spears Sex Tape: Don't Hold Your Breath, No, It's Not Her, BREAKING: Britney Spears Sex Tape, Maybe, Britney Spears in Harper's Bazaar, Celebrity NippleWatch™: Britney Spears, Britney Panty Flash, Britney Boobenslippen, Britney Spears: The Downward Spiral