Fleshbot: nutrition

Cum Omlettes: A Tasty New Way To Get Your Protein

Lux Alptraum — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 13:00:24 EDT

After the ten thousandth time you've swallowed someone's freshly shot load, the taste of cum can start to seem a little, well, boring. Day after day, blowjob after blowjob, the same thing over and over — it's only natural that one would want to get a little experimental and spice things up. Sure, you can always turn to the basic staples of cum condiments, mixing a little chocolate syrup or ice cream into your bedroom activities, but why not try something really different? Why not make a cum omlette (or, if you want to be all correct in your spelling, an omelette)? Sure, the logistics of collecting enough cum to fill a frying pan and actually cooking the omlette might be a little more work than you're used to — but when you're sitting down to a ~~delicious~~ breakfast of a fresh cum omlette, all that work will be worth it. Want to make a meal of it? Pair your cum omlette with an ass smoothie for a nutritionally balanced breakfast your mom would be proud of.

· Cum Omlette (cumomlette.com)
· Thumbnail star via Ask Jolene

Those crazy Europeans and their sexified...

Lux Alptraum — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 11:13:55 EDT

Those crazy Europeans and their sexified advertisements ... what will they think of next? Now if only someone could come up with a way to pornify such mundane tasks as brushing our teeth, or doing housework... oh wait. Nevermind. (sexoteric.com)

Good To The Last Drops (Except When It's Not): "Ass Smoothies" On Demand

Jonnobot — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 17:57:55 EST

"It's not every day that we get a line of videos that deals solely with women putting frozen fruit drinks in their asses and then drinking them," understates a corporate flack in the press release for the VOD release of the "Ass Smoothies" line of videos, whipped up fresh from the paysite of the same name. "It's a whole new level of niche, novelty porn." He could definitely say that again — and although we too would love the opportunity to retype the phrase "women putting frozen fruit drinks in their asses and then drinking them", we'll just let you read the whole tasty press release we received this week after the jump. One thing's for sure: dirtpipe milkshakes aren't the only things on the menu for breakfast anymore!

. . .

SHAKEN OR STIRRED: YAPPO.COM ANNOUNCES THE LAUNCH OF ASS SMOOTHIE VIDEOS

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: March 4, 2008

Los Angeles/CA - Yappo.com, an internet content company for adult entertainment streaming videos on the consumer's own terms, is pleased to announce an exclusive deal with Redpath Productions and the launch of the infamous line of "Ass Smoothie" videos.

The "Ass Smoothie" concept has beautiful porn starlets making their favorite blended drink by pouring the ingredients into their own bodies, mixing them internally and then drinking the concoction.

Among the featured "Smoothie Starlets" are Cheyenne who enjoys the berry smoothie margarita; Alicia who likes her margarita combined with soy milk; Melanie who cultivated a taste for the melon milkshake; Jocelyn who named her smoothie of sliced peaches, orange juice and yogurt Jaded Julius, among other stirred up, saucy smoothies.

"This is some of the most specialized content we've ever seen," said Liam Collins, VOD Product Manager for Yappo.com. "It's not every day that we get a line of videos that deals solely with women putting frozen fruit drinks in their asses and then drinking them. It's a whole new level of niche, novelty porn."

The Redpath Productions content is released via the RoyalVault.com affiliate program, which includes the adult pay sites of www.asssmoothie.com and www.iloveyoumadison.com, among others.

· Ass Smoothie (membership tour + previews @ asssmoothie.com)
· Redpath Productions: Ass Smoothies VOD (yappo.com)