Fleshbot: maya gates

Tera Patrick’s Porn Star "Pool Party" Restores Hope To A Weary Nation

DCypher — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:00:00 EST

Now that we've crossed the precipice into the cold heart of a lonely winter recession, it's hard to recall the halcyon days behind us. Fading images wistfully haunt our memories like ghostly vapors, as we try to relive those days spent lounging and exploring new levels of excess—like when we had those 17 stunning lesbians come over to the sun drenched West Coast Fleshbot mansion in bikinis and frivolously frolic in and out of the pool in varying states of undress while midgets in diapers lend a vacillating air of depravity and absurdity. And just when we thought it was all a forgotten dream, Tera Patrick goes and releases her latest “all star” lesbian pool party movie... and it all comes rushing back to us. God bless you, Miss Patrick!

If our extensive experience in this area has taught us one thing, it's that we can't bring this many lascivious porn stars together without them eventually fucking each other senseless. And, as we'd expect, Tera Patrick, Daisy Marie, Daisy Dukes, Madison Scott, Kayla Paige, Angie Savage, Mya Luanna, Charmane Star, Lexi Belle, Maya Gates, Shawna Lenee, and several of their friends do exactly that, stripping out of their bikinis and lapping away at each other like kittens enjoying seventeen fresh bowls of cream. The results are disturbingly good, making us feel as immoral and decadent as an AIG executive with a golden parachute after the bail out. Move over, Hef—Tera wants to show you what the grotto should look like every single day of the week.

If anything, Tera's given us hope in a way that even our President Elect can only allude to. While most of us will have to tighten our belts this holiday season, finding pleasure in the simple joys of life, we can always look forward to history repeating itself. Our eyes are glassy after watching these lovely ladies work themselves into a frenzy, dreaming of a time when we will once again be able to blaze up our medical grade hydroponic with freshly minted hundred dollar bills. In fact, with ideas this good, we're thinking Tera for Prez 2012. You with us?

"Tera Patrick’s Pool Party" is available this week.

· Teravision (teravision.com)

The Second Time's A Charm: "Not The Bradys: Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!"

Lux Alptraum — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 17:30:10 EST

Now that the market is glutted with "Not The" and "This Ain't" XXX titles rehashing our favorite sitcoms as honest-to-goodness porns, it can be hard to remember that it wasn't always this way—that there was, in fact, a very first "Not The" porn, one that changed the way we think of hardcore parodies. Yes, just over a year ago, "Not The Bradys XXX" descended on the porniverse, changing the face of porn parody forever. Now, that epic porn has spawned a sequel: "Not The Bradys XXX: Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!" But does "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!" have the charms of its predecessor?

Despite some casting changes (most notably, Teagan Presley replacing Hillary Scott as Marcia), "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!" manages to hold on to much of what made the first "Not The Bradys" work so well: it is, quite literally, like watching an episode of "The Brady Bunch," only with a whole lot of sex. Campy humor and silly puns abound, the kids get into various scrapes, Marcia idolizes a rock star, and the whole family comes together to sing in a contest. Oh, and there are many, many sex scenes, almost all of which manage to be tied into the "plot," if somewhat tenuously.

Attentive Fleshbot readers may remember that, back in July, Teagan Presley retired from boy-girl hardcore scenes. "Not The Bradys XXX:" was shot mere months before that announcement, making it among Teagan's last boy-girl scenes. So there you have it: not only is this good porn, it's also a significant piece of pornorabilia. Like you need more reason to buy it?

· Not The Bradys XXX (bradysxxx.com)

Katsuni Gets "Minx"ed

DCypher — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 15:05:36 EDT

We hear that reclusive and mysterious Digital Playground directrix Celeste is becoming more and more like the late Howard Hughes these days: apparently she is rarely seen in public anymore, and when she is it is only in a (stylish!) bathrobe with tissue box slippers, a protective face mask, and smoky, rose-colored eyeglasses. We chalked off her eccentricities years ago to the single-minded devotion with which she approaches her art—surely all those slow motion techniques and lovingly crafted panning techniques she's built her reputation on entitle her to auteur status. And if auteurs are anything, they're eccentric.

So what does all this have to do with her latest release (sorry, "cut") for Digital Playground, "Katsuni Minx"? Well, nothing really—but since we know you depend on us to tell you all about the secret lives of otherwise unheralded porn directors, we figured we'd share a something a little insidery with you by way of introduction. That said, we also know that when we receive a new release from the porn star-turned-director it will showcase not only a bunch of smoldering hot models but that it will be presented with an attention to detail that is another one of Celeste's trademarks. And "Katsuni Minx" certainly lives up to those expectations.

In addition to sex goddess Katsuni, "Katsuni Minx" also stars Maya Gates, Brandi Edwards, Paola Rey, Micah Moore, and pint-sized fan favorite Alexis Love. The sets are as lovely as the girls—not that you'll be likely to be paying much attention to the sets, but still—and the sex is every bit as hot as it looks in these preview shots the good folks at Digital Playground shared with us. Sometimes, it's good to have an auteur around the house. Even if they are wearing tissue boxes on their feet.

• "Katsuni Minx" (DVD info and trailers @ digitalplayground.com)
• Order: "Katsuni Minx" (Adult DVD Empire)

Breaking: Randy Spears Caught With "Latina Hollywood Hookers"

DCypher — Mon, 12 May 2008 14:50:16 EDT

Time was when you couldn't watch a new porn release without seeing veteran swordsman Randy Spears marinating his pickle in some barely legal starlet. In an attempt to dominate the adult feature market by locking down one of its strongest performer-slash-actors, Wicked Pictures signed Spears to an exclusive contract and after making his directorial debut for the company we haven't heard much from him since. In the meantime, while other male performers have jockeyed to fill the vacuum left by Spears' absence, we've heard barely a peep from the man himself ... and now we know why.

This week, an undercover team of crack reporters have managed to find out what's been keeping Spears distracted this whole time: it seems that he's been keeping company with the likes of Demi Delilah, Daisy Marie, Maya Gates, Sienna West, and Cassandra Cruz over at Madame Demi's agency for hot Latina babes and the men who love them. Let's hope things work out better for Spears than they did for that Spitzer character (and that none of her clientele turn out to be INS agents).

· "Latina Hollywood Hookers" (Adult DVD Empire)
· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)