Fleshbot: marketing

Pink Visual's Porn Stimulus Package

Gram Ponante — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 11:30:01 EDT

For those who pay for porn (we're traveling in purely theoretical realms here), Pink Visual's version of "Cash for Clunkers" is pretty funny: Simply give up your old porn website membership and get a huge discount on a new one.

Imagine, if you will, all those couples cruising around parking lots with pro-sumer video cameras in search of seduceable teens driving cars they purchased with the government's Cash for Clunkers program, then you get to watch 400 continuous hours of the "Couples Seduce Teens" for just ten bucks.

"Originally we had planned to have consumers provide us with some small bit of evidence that they've canceled their subscription to another company's site," said a Pink Visual marketing maven, "but we thought that might get too unwieldy, so we decided to run it on the honor system and boil it down to a promo code."

Type "Clunkers" in the promo code all through September and get half off DVDs as well as new memberships to PinkVisual.com (and its gay little brother, MaleSpectrum.com) for $9.95.

We don't normally hype marketing putsches, but we applaud creativity, and Pink Visual's recent strategies (like putting iPods in movies, using recyclable DVD covers, and offering OctoMom Nadya Suleman diapers rather than offering to put her in a porn movie) are fun.

· Pink Visual (pinkvisual.com)
· Buy "Bubble Butts Galore 4" (gamelink.com)

Great Moments In Strip Club Marketing

Lux Alptraum — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 17:30:01 EST

Say you're a classy ~~strip joint~~ gentleman's club looking to upgrade your marketing for the new millenium. What do you do? How about making one of those podcasts? That's what the kids are into, right?

We can only assume that that was (more or less) the idea behind "Ask A Stripper Anything?", a web video series produced by Rick's Cabaret. The series, which has been going strong(ish) since mid-August, features Heather—the stripper in question—asking, and answering, questions about anything (though mostly about sex).

Well, if the adult industry wants to survive, it has to embrace new technology, right?

(And no, we don't know why the title ends in a question mark, either.)

· Ask A Stripper Videos (ricks.com)
· Rick's Cabaret (ricks.com)

If brands like Converse were smart, they'd...

Jonnobot — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 10:40:06 EDT

If brands like Converse were smart, they'd start paying for product placement in altporn movies like "Debbie Loves Dallas" and "Circa '82" to reach their target demographic of hip young adult consumers. Then again, thanks to movies like "Debbie Loves Dallas" and "Circa '82", maybe they don't have to pay for product placement after all. (adage.com)

The sexy coffee craze in the Pacific Northwest...

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 09:20:01 EDT

The sexy coffee craze in the Pacific Northwest has apparently gotten out of hand as "Espresso Gone Wild" is being told to cover up or shut down. (Personally, we think they should be fined for the name.) Won't someone please think of the ~~children~~ health code violations? (azcentral.com)

Rubber 55: Latex Goes Viral

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 14:45:29 EDT

Say you're a latex clothing company that specializes in unusual, hard-to-find and even harder-to-slip-into fetish wear—you know, the kind of stuff that most people need and don't even realize it. How do you get your message out to the non latex-wearing masses? Viral marketing to the rescue! Just shoot a video parody of "MTV Cribs" that shows off your sense of humor and your wardrobe collection at the same time, get it up on YouTube, and you'll be an overnight viral sensation. (OK, so it took a little over a year for this video to reach us—which means maybe the overnight part didn't work out that great. But then no one moves fast when they're wearing a rubber catsuit.)

. . .

· "Pads" (YouTube, via notcot.org)
· Rubber55 (rubber55.co.uk)

American Apparel: For All Your Masturbatory Needs

Lux Alptraum — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 12:45:06 EDT

Showing true dedication to filling your life with as much sexy as possible, American Apparel has moved beyond its softcore ads into the realm of sex toy peddling by stocking the storied Hitachi Magic Wand on its shelves somewhere between the unitards and the leggings. As you can probably imagine, we're pretty stoked about this development—though we'll be even more stoked when they decide to expand their offerings a bit. Confidential to Dov Charney: if you need need any suggestions for your sex toy inventory, all you have to do is ask. (store.americanapparel.net, via streetbonersandtvcarnage.com)

And speaking of sex toys (purple or otherwise):...

Lux Alptraum — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:50:27 EDT

And speaking of sex toys (purple or otherwise): do you ever find yourself paging longingly through our Marital Aid Test Kitchen archives wishing that you too could be a professional dildo reviewer? Here's your chance: sex toy retailer LoveHoney is now recruiting judges for the UK Sex Toy Awards, and twenty lucky Brits will have the chance to test out ten sex toys each as part of the process. (Yeah, you have to be a UK resident to participate—but if there's a better reason to emigrate we'd like to know what it is.) Apply today! (lovehoney.co.uk)

We've long wondered why so many sex toys...

Lux Alptraum — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 11:20:04 EDT

We've long wondered why so many sex toys are purple—and finally, someone has taken the time to try and find out. Even if this poll of several sex toy luminaries still doesn't explain our peculiar fascination with a certain large and fuzzy fast food promotional character. (nakedcity.com)

The Bunny Ranch in Nevada is fighting back...

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 29 May 2008 09:59:16 EDT

The Bunny Ranch in Nevada is fighting back against (Anti-)American Airlines' silly policies, by reimbursing weary travelers for the $15 bag checking fee. So now you can splurge and get that extra reach around! (bunnyranch.com, via jaunted.com)

This Week In Book Promos: The Art Of The Blowjob

Lux Alptraum — Wed, 21 May 2008 13:50:55 EDT

Think Chuck Palahniuk's the only one who can make a viral video to promo his book? Think again: Chuck's faux porn has nothing on the sexy stylings of this promo for "Licking After You," an e-book that aims to educate couples about the finer points of giving head. The advantage of course, is that the book and the promo contain actual sex. Animated sex, but with special effects what they are these days, you can hardly tell the difference.

· Oral Sex Art (YouPorn)

Earlier this week, London's Hyde Park was...

Lux Alptraum — Wed, 21 May 2008 10:28:02 EDT

Earlier this week, London's Hyde Park was filled with topless ladies riding horses as part of a promo for the DVD release of "Lady Godiva." Man, why do we always seem to miss all the British fun? (prphotos.com, via Sexoteric)

"Chitty Chitty Gang Bang": Chuck Palahniuk Goes Deeper Into Cassie Wright

Violet Blue — Thu, 15 May 2008 12:50:15 EDT

With the imminent release of "Fight Club" author Chuck Palahniuk's book "Snuff" it's never been more clear to us that (a) his marketeers have some really excellent drug connections, and (b) Palahniuk's obsession with fictional aging porn star Cassie Wright is as surreal as his novels. After the awesome fake retro "Wizard Of Ass" trailer comes "Chitty Chitty Gang Bang", another wacky sendup of classic porn tropes complete with bad dialogue, scary sound effects and ridiculous scenarios. Which is nothing like real porn, of course. (Maybe it's better?)

Still, to get the full effect of the Palahniuk's book (whose title may or may not give away the ending), one only need look at the author's bizarre "interviews" with present-day Cassie Wright to realize that being in a Palahniuk novel might just be like being inside his actual brain. Watch the faux "Chitty Chitty Gang Bang" trailer below, plus a video where Palahniuk himself interviews a Divine-inspired Cassie Wright as she reveals how "Chitty Chitty" was her "chance to do real acting". (Ed note: So why hasn't anyone made a real porn movie called "World Whore 3: The Whore To End All Whores" anyway?)

. . .

Fake trailer: "Chitty Chitty Gang Bang"

. . .

Chuck Palahniuk Interviews Cassie Wright, part 1:

· Cassie Wright (myspace.com)
· Chuck Palahniuk (chuckpalahniuk.net)
· "Snuff" by Chuck Palahniuk (Amazon)

Chuck Palahniuk's "Snuff" And The Legend Of Cassie Wright

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 09 May 2008 14:54:06 EDT

Reading a book by Chuck Palahniuk—author of cult classics like "Fight Club" and "Lullaby"—has occasionally been described as a mindfuck. Time-bending stories of vividly bizarre characters in surreal situations is kind of his specialty. For his latest novel, however, he's moved on from mind fucking to just, well ... fucking. "Snuff" is the story of veteran pornstar Cassie Wright, who hopes to end her career with a big bang. A 600-person gangbang to be specific. How and why she accomplishes this, you'll have to read the book to discover, but we are amused by the online efforts to imagine what Cassie's career might have looked like in the real world. We don't know where she would have ended up in the firmament of today's pornstars, but we do know that we would like to have seen her interpretation of Dorothy in "The Wizard of Ass." (See the "trailer" below.) Who says that literature is dead?

...

· Cassie Wright (myspace.com)
· Chuck Palahniuk (chuckpalahniuk.net)
· "Snuff" by Chuck Palahniuk (Amazon)

Fleshbot's Hot Wet Reader Survey Action

Jonnobot — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:40:51 EDT

Come on, baby. You know you want it ... but we want it even more. Yes, we're talking to you: you, who visits us during the day at work, with one hand nervously poised over your Esc key in case the boss happens by while the other is busy ... er, at your keyboard too, since we know you're not the type of person who jerks off at your desk. And you, the one who visits us late and night when the wife or husband and kids are asleep, to keep up with all the sex news ... because we know you just read us for the articles, and that's fine too) And you there in the back, who found us via a Google search for "Adriana Lima Sex Tape" and are confused by this whole "blog" thing you stumbled across instead (and who are still looking for that sex tape).

We (and our advertisers!) want all of you ... to take ten minutes or so from your busy browsing and/or fapping schedule and answer our latest reader survey. Aside from our eternal gratitude, you'll also get a chance to win a $300 AmEx gift card. But really: isn't that warm feeling of knowing that you're helping make Fleshbot a Better Place for your fellow ~~pervs~~ sexual adventurers reward enough?

· Take the Fleshbot Reader Survey (and read the rules if you'd like a chance to win that gift card)

Strange as it may seem, there are actually...

Lux Alptraum — Fri, 04 Apr 2008 09:59:06 EDT

Strange as it may seem, there are actually some women out there who want to avoid nip slips. For these ~~spoilsports~~ more modest types, we present the Winkee, a thong-like bra attachment that does away with any chance of untoward exposure (and, we might add, cleavage). We're hoping this thing doesn't catch on—it could totally put us out of business. (thewinkee.com, via dailybedpost.com)

The Gabriella Fox™ Experience: Are You Ready?

Gram Ponante — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 21:06:28 EDT

Hey!™ It might be because newest Digital Playground contract lady Gabriella Fox™, like her immediate predecessor Riley Steele™, also looks like she was formed from the hip of Jesse Jane™, that we can't stop thinking of the blissfully public domain Stoya.

Still, we "look forward to working very closely with Gabriella and helping her to grow a prestigious career at Digital Playground. We welcome Gabriella Fox™ as our newest contract star and look forward to presenting her to our phenomenal fans."

· "DIGITAL PLAYGROUND SIGNS EXCLUSIVE DEAL WITH GABRIELLA FOX (TM)" (digitalplayground.com)

Breaking: Naughty Ad Collection Shows That Sex Sells

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 11:19:38 EST

You probably haven't noticed this before because advertising is such a subtle and sophisticated art form, but companies that sell things will occasionally use sexual imagery in their sales pitches in an effort to entice you buy their products. It's true! By showcasing their wares alongside something else that the public finds appealing—a beautiful woman, an romantic story, vaginas—the consumer will subconsciously associate that product with their sexual urges ... and then act on that urge by buying lite beer or awful-smelling body sprays. Again, you probably weren't even aware this was happening because marketing executives are like trickster gods that can convince you to do their bidding and pay for the privilege of doing so. You should study advertising blog TrendHunter's list of the top sexual ads of recent memory (or our "advertising" tag page, where you've seen many of these pitches before) so that you will be better prepared to handle them in real life. Now if you'll excuse us, we just remembered that we have to go buy a sandwich or a car or something.

· Top 67 Naughty Ads - Sex Sells (trendhunter.com, via shakewellbeforeuse.com)

Another week, another porn award marketing...

Jonnobot — Tue, 26 Feb 2008 12:44:51 EST

Another week, another porn award ~~marketing scheme~~ extravaganza: this time around, the Adult DVD Empire Awards show off the adult industry's best and brightest according to ... uh, whoever voted for them. Guess maybe "Operation: Desert Stormy" really is as good as everyone says it is! (empireawards.com)

Why American Advertising Sucks, Part 489 (Hint: Not Enough Boobs)

Dashiell Bennett — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 13:05:55 EST

Americans have known for years that Europeans can get away with a lot more on their television airwaves then we ever could here. Commercials in particular seem to contain a lot more sexual imagery, sexual innuendo ... and sometimes just straight up sex. If you don't believe us, check out this French commercial that is the second most popular spot on video ad site Firebrand and one of filthiest ads we've ever seen that wasn't advertising actual porn. You may be asking yourself, "What product could possibly require such a salacious come on in order to convince people to purchase it?" The answer: Fruit. Yes, fruit commercials in France are naughtier than anything you'll see on basic cable in the states. We can only imagine what their primetime line up is like.

. . .

· Association de Producteurs des Fruits (firebrand.com, via Gawker)

* * * * *

Previously: "2 Girls 1 Cupcake": Stormy Goes Viral, "Filthy Food", "Eat Your Froots and Vejtabulls (lolpr0n)

We all had fun with those mid-air hijinks...

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 13:38:11 EST

We all had fun with those mid-air hijinks yesterday, but the real antics happen on the planes of Ryanair—when their advertising isn't getting banned and their flight attendants aren't posting for saucy calendar photos that is. (cmmnews.blogspot.com, via copyranter.blogspot.com)