· Three things we know about Almudena Fernandez: she's sexy, she looks great in lingerie, and ... uh, she's sexy. What were we saying again? (publicnipslips.blogspot.com)

· GoDaddy needs a new pair of breasts corporate spokesmodel to hawk whatever it is they sell. Apparently it's not breasts. (godaddygirls.com, via adrants.com)

· Ohnoez!!1!! Pornography has us all in a "Death Grip!" That's funny ... we don't feel sick. (catholic.org)

· An Australian Rules football star shares his thoughts on life: "You haven't lived until you've had (a beauty queen) snort coke off your dick." Wow ... we have got to watch more Australian Rules football. (theage.com.au)

· Not busy this week? Head on down to the Bulgarian Eros Show. Eastern European pornstars! Free AIDS tests! Any reason at all to go to Bulgaria! (novinite.com)

· Nordic countries spend a lot of time thinking about pornography and society. Well, if you lived in a place that was dark six months of the year, how would you kill the time? (norden.org + icelandreview.com)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives

· Middle-aged suburban moms discover pole dancing and millions of teen-aged and twenty-something children try to pretend they didn't hear that. (nytimes.com)

· Pink is looking pretty healthy in her bikini and if you don't agree, she will absolutely kick the shit out of you. (hollywoodtuna.com)

· Cameron Diaz loves Drew Barrymore too much to let her dance around in the surf all by herself. They're like, totally BFFL, you know. (toxicmagazine.com)

· More on the Icelandic porn convention that wasn't. How can porn be illegal in a place where you can't go outside nine months out of the year? (icelandreview.com)

· Apparently, being a sex worker in Thailand is not as glamorous and exciting as all those American sex tourists would have you believe. (sundaytimes.lk)

· Meanwhile, sex workers in India would like to be known as "entertainment workers." Fine, but only if we can call ourselves entertainment bloggers. (expressindia.com)

· Woe to the teacher whose students discover that she bears a striking resemblance to a porn star. She'd probably get more respect from them, if she actually was a porn star. (dailyrecord.co.uk)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives

· Be honest: was the headline accompanying this picture of Patricia Heaton's see-through dress a little too obvious? (drunkenstepfather.com)

· We don't know what the big deal is, but Janet Jackson's breasts look fine to us. She has boobs, there's two of them, what more do you want? (celebitchy.com)

· No one can agree on the size of the porn industry, but one thing is certain: It's bigger than the population of Iceland. But apparently not bigger than the stuck up Radisson hotel that canceled their adult conference. Like they've got anything better to do up there in the winter. (icelandreview.com)

· It's time for Encyclopedia Brown and the Case of the Mysterious Porn DVDs Left Scattered on the Ground Near A School. Can our hero solve the puzzle? (myfoxtwincities.com)

· It looks like you can still get drunk while throwing dollar bills at the girls at Scores. (For now.) Whew ... that was a close one, wasn't it? (ny1.com)

· Parishioners in church on Ash Wednesday heard sexy noises emanating from the pews. Was it a stupid prank or an act of God? He does work in mysterious ways. (freenewmexican.com)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives