Orgy at the Villa

Studio: Private
Director: Andrew Newman
Cast: Madison Parker, Simone Peach, Jasmyne Black, Mike Angelo, Natalli di Angelo, Kid Jamaica, Naomy, Sandy, Eve Angel, Zenza Raggi

Review by: Gram Ponante

When I received Private's "Orgy at the Villa," I assumed the venerable Barcelona-based porn giant was getting into the parody market and taking aim at Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi's flabby adulterous escapades. Luckily I was wrong.

Instead, this delightful Euroromp follows Mario, described in voiceover as a Chicago nightclub owner who turned state's witness (don't worry - this bit of subtext is never mentioned again) as he beds bartenders and exotic dancers in tandem with his Brazilian buddy Marcos in sunny Portugal.

I am not as familiar with Europe's porn talent as I am with America's resources. But I want to be.

As Mario and Marcos reunite at the latter's villa with their dates, we watch in fascination as the blonde who just sucked her own ass off Marcos' dick greets the couples' guests. Luckily it is in the European way, with kisses on the cheeks, rather than full on the mouth.

Mario takes a nap after his trip but his girlfriend greets Marcos for a tryst on the balcony. We get the sense that Mario wouldn't mind, as everyone knows there will be an orgy later anyway. And even though Marcos doesn't seem like the brightest bulb (after his guests have been at his villa for several minutes, he announces "this is my house!"), we understand implicitly that the two men have shared much in their lives.

And, as guests filter in with a voiceover describing their relationship with one another ("Eve left Marcos' huge cock for Sandy's plump pussy lips"), we are again reminded that socialized healthcare is not the only reason to live in Europe.

The voiceovers are charming. Private releases movies in several languages so we are happy for the effort, even if, narratively, we know that no backstory will matter if there's going to be a giant poolside fuckfest at the end of the movie (which there is).

A character is introduced later in the movie, Mike (the dramatis personae are not really made clear, but it is easy to tell from the credits that Marcos, the black guy, is Kid Jamaica, and Mario, who speaks with a Hungarian accent, is the multi-pseudonymned Zenza Raggi, so that the person identified by the voiceover as "Mike" must be the only other man listed in the credits: Mike Angelo. No one said reviewing porn was easy. Oh, someone did? Well it's not) who has the best job of the movie: he picks up a stunning large-breasted girl on the beach and takes her to the orgy at the villa. At press time I can't figure out who she is, but she is the type of woman who can box your ears with her breasts, like she was the porn version of Mr. Gower from "It's A Wonderful Life."

The characters thus assembled, each with his or her own backstory provided by a narratrix who may or may not be in the movie, the event described in the title happens after an awkward mimosa toast. Poolside, on lounges, with high heels, drinks in hand, they fuck, and fuck, and fuck.

I don't know what else to say about this movie other than I believed it. I think this actually happened. If only Silvio Berlusconi could have been there.

Private (private.com)
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Photographer Uwe Ommer (who you may remember from his "Do It Yourself" project) falls into the latter category, as evidenced by his "Obamania" photo series. Though we're not completely sure what his message is (perhaps a statement on Obama's sexualization by the mass media?), we're oddly compelled by the photos. Maybe we just have a thing for naked girls in masks.

· Obamania (uweommer.eu, via yuhmm.com)

The list is a tad predictable, and leans heavily towards the played-a-politician-once picks (yes, Lisa Ann heads it up), but hey, we approve of bringing more porn to Blackbook, so we're not going to argue it.

But we would like to know: if you had to pick a pornstar to govern you, who would you like to see in office? on our end, we'd love to bow down to Belladonna: we've seen what she's done with her company...imagine what she could do with the country?

· Post-Stormy Daniels: 8 Pornstars Ready to Stuff the Political Void (blackbookmag.com)

Daniels was arrested in Tampa on Saturday afternoon for domestic abuse. Her husband and publicist declined to comment. This is an age-old political trick: leave them wanting more.

She posted $1,000 bail the next day and headed to California, where on Monday she had sex with British citizen Tony DeSergio on the set of "Sex, Lies, And Spies."

This followed the alleged car bomb that totaled the ride of her political advisor, Brian Welsh, in New Orleans the Thursday before.

Are these events related? Possibly. But before counting Daniels out as the next Junior Senator from the Bayou State, remember that everyone from Edward Kennedy to David Duke to Arnold Schwarzenegger got elected in the face of bigger scandals. And they all have worse breasts. And considering the history of elected office in Louisiana, I think this weekend might just put her ahead.

· Stormy Daniels Arrested for Domestic Violence (xbiz.com)
· Intrigue: Stormy's political advisor hit with car bomb (gramponante.com)

Daniels, who is making a stangely not altogether quixotic run for the U.S. Senate, could have used her porn superstar status to call the movie "Stormented" but she is humble, so she did not.

She and Starr donned getups reminiscent of Tom Petty videos and Mad Hatter's (played by Austrian Mick Blue) Tea Parties for this segment, which serves as a fever dream Stormy's character has while in the Crazy Hospital.

Daniels is herself petite, but Starr looked microscopic by comparison.

"You look like a trial size," Stormy said.

The Wicked Pictures set in North Hollywood was festooned with storybook props, all of which were solid and unyielding. Hard to fuck on, in other words.

But the woman who might some day be known in Senate parlance as The Lady from Louisiana took it in stride. "I'm pretty tough," she said.

Yes, you are. We have a feeling you'll go a lot farther in politics than Mary Carey did.

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

It is a complex world, particularly now with all kinds of craziness rearing its head in the stock market, in politics, in real estate, and we'd like to take a moment to wish Stormy a happy, sane and enjoyable 30th birthday.

Take a load off, Stormy – just kick off your shoes, have a piece of cake – whatever your favorite kind is – and relax for a little bit. Take a listening tour of Louisiana tomorrow; it'll still be there.

Oh, and Happy St. Patrick's Day, as well. Have some green beer with that cake.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Stormy Daniels at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Stormy Daniels's movies (gamelink.com)

· Buy The Final Battle Original Art (ebay.com)

We're so confused. Which is it? Pro-porn or anti-porn? And how will Holder and Ogden ever get along?

· 'Pornography Advocate at DOJ': One of the Bright Spots in the Obama Administration (reason.com)

Well, at least the imaginary pornographers in this Landline TV video, which envisions what would happen if the Obama Administration hired the nation's top grossing production company to make an educational film about the stimulus package... and that production company turned out to be a porno-making one.

As you may imagine, hijinks ensue... and as for us, well, we're just waiting for Hustler to release "This Ain't The Stimulus Package XXX." Any day now, right?

· Lucid Films Presents: "The Stimulus Package" (landlinetv.com)
· Thumbnail: patriot Michelle (juicybucks.com)

As the Daily Beast has it, Stormy's gaze was turned towards political pursuits when she discovered "Draft Stormy," a web-based campaign to convince Stormy to attempt to unseat Vitter in the Republican primary. Now, we're all for seeing hypocritical politicians ousted out of office—particularly ones who trump their conservative, anti-sex credentials while secretly visiting prostitutes in their spare time—but there's just something a little off-putting about the whole "Draft Stormy" campaign.

We'll cut to the chase: we're bothered by the fact Stormy Daniels isn't being "drafted" because she's Stormy Daniels, the awesome and amazing individual—she's being drafted, first and foremost, because she's a pornstar from Louisiana. Long before "Draft Stormy" ever existed, an ad appeared on Craigslist seeking "a female in some aspect of the adult-entertainment industry" to run against Vitter. Stormy only became the chief candidate that she was a Louisiana-based pornstar who just might work as a candidate.

And why a female from the adult industry? Because the people behind the campaign want to make the point that:

...an honest, intelligent adult film actress has more integrity than a married Republican politician who dallied with prostitutes on the down-low.

Which, frankly, we think sounds a bit condescending to the adult industry—and, for that matter, to Stormy. (We're also curious to know why the campaign specifically wanted an adult film actress—does "Draft Evan Stone" just not have the same ring?)

But hey, maybe we're just being negative nellies here: after all, if Stormy does run, there's a huge opportunity for progress right there. Italy elected its first pornstar politician in 1987—maybe 2009 will be the year America follows in its footsteps?

We'll be keeping our fingers crossed for that one.

· Draft Stormy (draftstormy.com)
· Porn Star for Senate (thedailybeast.com)
· Stormy Daniels: Politics, P. Diddy, and the Porn Retirement Plan (avn.com)

But we will claim to know that Stormy Daniels is an intelligent, accomplished woman with a good head on her shoulders (and a talent for public speaking). So we're sad to hear that she will not be running for Louisiana senator—we're sure she would have made a hell of a candidate. Maybe next election?

· Sinator Vitter (bestofneworleans.com, via pornstarbabylon.wordpress.com)
· Thumbnail from Penthouse (penthouse.com, via Ask Jolene

Well, AdultSpoof and Hustler are still churning out their respective porno parodies (both sites still indicate that certain scenes are "coming soon!"), but is there really any market for hardcore Paylin action now that Palin herself has left the public stage? We can't even begin to guess at the answer—so, of course, we're going to turn it over to you, the people. Tell us: now that the election is over and done, are you more or less to fantasize about the secret lives of hockey moms?

. . .

· Burning Angel - Vote Obama! (burningangel.com)
· Photos from JoannaAngel.com (joannaangel.com)

. . .

· Obama Is Nailin' Palin! (husterworld.com)