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Sat Aug 30
14 posts in the last 24 hours
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John D.
Senior Editor:
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Associate Editor:
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Gal Friday:
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The founder of the company that makes the fake penis enlargement pill Enzyte has been sentenced to 25 years in prison for fraud (!). That's what you get for making people feel bad about their small penises ... and defrauding the public of about $400 million. Now will people stop buying that crap? (ap.google.com)
Now that all the airlines are looking to add in-flight internet service, the biggest question on everyone's mind is, of course, who is going to be responsible for telling the guy in 18-B to turn down the volume on "Cum Fart Tsumani". Although it could give a whole new meaning to the concept of a "red eye" flight. (foxnews.com)
Despite having untold scores of pasty-faced conventioneers in town, Denver strip clubs are suffering from a bit of a lull this week. Since when do people prefer political speeches to bathtub shows? The solution is simple, however—next week's tech convention will set things right! Nerds to the rescue! (denverpost.com)
It may be hard to believe, but Ron Jeremy's been in porn for almost thirty years — and to think, he got into because he wanted to be an actor! Well, for what it's worth, Ron, we thought your performance in "Not The Bradys XXX" totally deserved an Oscar. (time.com)
Poor Foxy Jacky: all she wanted to do was make a hot little video of her getting naughty at a public playground. Unfortunately, some people in the Memphis suburb of Bartlett Grove aren't too keen on public nudity, though they are keen on tracking down Jacky and making her pay for what she's done, as the local news makes abundantly clear. Check out Jacky's video and some Memphis news coverage after the jump.
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A Cincinnati high school ran into a bit of a problem when they recently learned that the skirts worn by their football cheerleaders actually violate the school's dress code. And it's not like you can tell cheerleaders to wear pants—that goes against what cheerleading is all about! (cincinnati.com)
They Do Things Different Over There
A cougar in Britain and her 17-year-old boyfriend spent the night in jail after having sex in a train station—but were sent home in the morning with nothing more than a stern "caution." Gosh, we hope no one's feelings got hurt! (freshnews.in, via nerve.com; dramatization via blueplayers.com, via Ask Jolene)
Because you have been waiting for weeks now to know for certain, we are happy to inform you that Jenna Jameson is, at last and officially, totally pregnant, and tells Us Magazine that she will be "resting as much as possible" in anticipation of the big event. Which means that if you're expecting her to come out of retirement and do a Belladonna-style "My Ass Is Haunted" DVD over the next few months ... er, don't. (usmagazine.com)
This just in: Men and women sometimes trade sex for favors and gifts! There's even a name for this shocking new phenomenon. It's called "dating." (cnn.com, thumb via)
Nude figure models of the world unite! Seriously, because someone has started a guild for naked models in Washington D.C.. After all, you have nothing to lose ... because you already took your clothes off, right? (washingtonpost.com)
Sunny Leone Really Wants To Direct
You might think that the divine Sunny Leone already had her hands full with her responsibilities as a Vivid girl and all, but apparently our favorite Indo-Canadian crush object has a few more talents she hasn't exercised yet: word is that she'll be launching her own production line, SunLust Pictures, early next year. Sunny says that her movies "will appeal to many different niches" and that she plans to "direct, create, write and produce" all of them—though we noticed that "perform in" was conspicuously absent from that job description. Let's just hope she doesn't forget to keep exercising the talent that made us fall in love with her in the first place ... (Xbiz; thumbnail via vividvideoonline.com via Ask Jolene)
We're all for national security, but sometimes border patrol takes things a little too far: Newly added to the list of items to confiscate (for national safety, duh): penis enlargers, penis pumps, and cock rings. Maybe the penis really is mightier than the sword. (gizmodo.com, thumb from galleries.borderbangers.com via Ask Jolene)
It's really sad that the people who do some of society's most important jobs usually get paid so little for their efforts—like this summertime prostitute who has to work as a teacher nine months of the year just to pay the bills! Can't we vote in more pay raises for our sex workers? (kare11.com; thumb of hardworking sex teacher Charlie James via naughtyamerica.com, via Ask Jolene)
It seems that way down in the land down under people are more likely to use the internet to search for games than porn. And oddly enough, there was a spike in people searching for info on The Veronicas this past month! Wonder what that was all about? (news.com.au)
We've heard of some bad group sex experiences, but they very rarely end with one of the participants getting stabbed with a steak knife and sent to the hospital. Seriously, that almost never happens. Usually. Not every time, anyway. (madison.com)
We're bummed to hear from our pal Audacia Ray that the Village Voice has suddenly decided to shutter its Naked City blog, which had become as much a part of our daily routine as flossing and our late morning ass smoothie pick-me-up. Where are we supposed to keep up with the latest releases in the "Hey, Grandma Is A Whore" series now? (Uh, don't answer that.) (wakingvixen.com + nakedcity.com)
We're glad to see that the annual Boobs On Bikes parade has once again returned to Auckland to help some of our Kiwi friends beat those winter blahs—despite yet another attempt this year by breast-despising meanies to stop it. We're wondering if the organizers have any plans to franchise the event here in North America, because we could totally use some cheering up around here too. Even if it's not winter yet. (moezilla.newsvine.com + reuters.com; thumbnail via sex-and-blogs.com)
If you're a fan of the bikini-clad baristas at your local drive-through espresso joint, dumping your spare change in their tip jar is probably a better way to show your appreciation instead of showing up in women's underwear and exposing yourself. Then again, they might not send you off with a complimentary cup of hot water for your trouble that way, so we guess it's your call. (kirotv.com; thumbnail via javagirls.net)
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