Finding the DVD, streaming video, or porn site that turns you on and gets you off is no easy proposition, even if you already know what you want to see. Porn is a vast genre with many subgenres, full of its own language and customs, confusing labels, and misleading titles-plus a whole lot of bad grammar. What's worse, many retailers (online and off) treat their stock with carelessness or even distaste, cramming porn together with no discernable sense of order. Alphabetical order is not invited to the party, Dewy decimal has left the building. And each website seems to have its own organizational logic. It would make a librarian homicidal. Even a naughty one.

In a lot of ways, finding the right porn is much like seeking out a Hollywood movie-you're really on your own to find it. But in a genre of film that has no road map, you'll need to know not only what you want and where to find it, but also the different types of porn available.

Start by creating a picture of what you hope to find in your porn, just as you'd order a meal in a restaurant. What are you hungry for? Small breasts, big butts, women in charge, realistic plots, blow jobs, two gals and a guy, male anal penetration, rough sex? This may not be your menu, but you get the idea. The important thing is that you make a list of all the qualities you hope to find in an adult video. Then make a second list of things you don't want to see. Do you get turned off by fake breasts, hairy men, rimming, toe-sucking, facial ejaculation, two women together, or watching group sex? These are just examples to get you brainstorming about what you think will send you over the edge-and what you think you'll want to skip through. As you watch porn, you'll probably find more to add to (or subtract from) either list, because sometimes we find things that turn us on or off that we didn't even know about.

Excerpted from The Smart Girl's Guide to Porn, written by Violet Blue and published by Cleis Press.

The book is on sale at Amazon, both as a paperback and e-book.

Copyright (c) 2009 by Violet Blue.

If you're an author or a book publicist and you want to participate in the Fleshbot Book Club, send email to Lux Alptraum.

Going over everything from how to ask her out to how to seal the deal, Amy's rundown is relatively thorough (well, as thorough as you can be in a six step listicle). Worried you won't have the chance to meet—let alone snog—Ms. Green? Fear not: even in the very likely situation that you and Amy remain thousands of miles (and many leagues) apart, we feel fairly certain that her words of wisdom will work equally well on other lasses. And even if they don't, well, at least the advice comes with some sexy pictures of Amy...so it's not a total wash.

· Amy Green: 'How To Bed Me'! (zootoday.com)

Featured in her interviews are Syd Blakovich, Jiz Lee, Dylan Ryan, and Madison Young—all of whom educate her on the ins and outs of a business that's poorly understood by most of the mainstream world. Thinking about getting your own start in adult? Read through the advice given by our lovely Crush Objects...and make sure to see Liz's piece for a thorough outline on exactly what not to do.

· Get Off My Back! (viceland.com)
· This Is How You Do It (viceland.com, via Jiz Lee)
· Photo by Courtney Trouble (courtneytrouble.com)

GettingIntoPorn.com is a very, very thorough (and free!) database of information, resources, and advice for women considering careers in the adult industry. Covering everything from picking a porn name to finding an agent to packing for a shoot to staying healthy, Monica offers wouldbe pornstars an excellent base from which to begin their careers...or to decide that the adult industry just isn't for them.

· Getting Into Porn (gettingintoporn.com)
· Monica Foster (monicaf.com)

We're especially crushed out on—well, actually, we kinda have crushes on everyone in the video (that's allowed, right?). We've pulled a sample clip for you (at left)—if it leaves you feeling hot and bothered, check out the full video at Hulu. (We'll be busying ourselves checking to see if Howcast has a "How To Have Great Anal Sex" softcore porn tutorial.)

· Howcast: How To Have Great Phone Sex (full video @ hulu.com, via Baby Sinead)

Anal sexpert and Crush Object Extraordinaire Tristan Taormino has just released "The Anal Sex Position Guide," which, well, offers couples advice on different positions to try when you're embracing the backdoor.

But this book is more than just an Ass-a Sutra (if you will): more than just a picture book of butt sex positions, "The Anal Sex Position Guide" is a full on tutorial discussing everything a couple needs to know before venturing into anal play—whether they're exploring his ass or hers, using a penis or a strap-on. Anatomy, safer sex, communication, lubrication, and sex toys are all thoroughly discussed—as are many other tips and pointers we wouldn't even have thought to include (like why Anal-Eze is bad, and what to do, or not do, about butt hair).

Rounding out the volume are a handful of erotic "inspiration" stories from some of our favorite erotica authors, and, of course, many, many hot pictures to illustrate the various positions discussed within the book (we've thoughtfully included a few samples below).

Whether you'd like to dip your toe into the waters of butt play, or are looking to spice up an already active anal sex life, "The Anal Sex Position Guide" is an absolute must buy. And even if you aren't into the ass at all, we still recommend taking a look. This might be the volume that makes you change your mind.

· Buy "The Anal Sex Position Guide" (amazon.com)
· Tristan Taormino (puckerup.com)

Yes, what the Playboy Kama Sutra lacks in fidelity to the original text, it more than makes up for in, uh, lingerie-clad centerfolds groping each other. We'd thought there was no way to improve on such a classic work... but once again, Playboy proved us wrong.

· Playboy's Kama Sutra (daily videos @ playboy.com)

We've been eagerly anticipating "Penny Flame's Expert Guide To Rough Sex" for almost a year now—ever since Penny and Tristan first announced the casting call for the project. Given our history of appreciation for the Vivid-Ed line of eduporns, and the fact that Penny Flame makes us melt, and, ahem, the fact that we enjoy a good (consensual!) roughing up... well, it's just hard to picture that this DVD could be anything less than a smashing success.

Of course, overly high expectations have gotten us in trouble before, so we tried to restrain ourselves as we pushed the DVD into our player. Our prudence turned out to be unnecessary: this film really is as good as we'd hoped.

As with all Vivid-Ed releases, this one begins with a lecture. Well, almost: right before the lecture, Penny introduces her animated helpers, Angel Penny and Devil Penny, who've been brought in to replace the overly whimsical Penny Pop-Up and Lube Fairy seen in "Penny Flame's Expert Guide To Handjobs" (you know, to show some sensitivity for the seriousness of the topic). But after that, it's on to the lecture: Penny walks us through the basics of rough sex, covering topics like communicating with your partner, picking a safe word, and—best of all, where (and how) to safely pinch, pull, slap, and smack your partner to your erotic delights. Assisting Penny in her demonstrations is a very eager (and very naked) Mia Lelani, who offers up her body as an educational tool.

Then, of course, it's on to the sex: and this is where the release really shines. The release offers three scenes (two maledom, and one femdom), where performers live out their rough sex fantasies. Intercut with the action are brief interludes of each performer explaining what, exactly, appeals to them about rough sex—and these interludes help increase the scenes' intensity: we know these people really want it rough.

The first of the three scenes features Penny Flame and Derrick Pierce. Though Penny's a fan of rough sex in her personal life, this is actually her first on-camera rough scene—and it's a really, really good one. Penny and Derrick play around with facefucking, slapping, choking, orgasm denial, and all sorts of fun D/S, and it's thrilling to watch their interchange and connection play out on screen. Okay, it's also thrilling to watch Penny get slapped around and forcefully fucked... but largely because she's just so incredibly into it.

Next we're introduced to Aiden Starr and Devin, who explore humiliation, dirty talk, and, yes, more D/S. This time, Aiden's in charge, and the roughness is more verbal than physical. Aiden orders Devin around, calling him a dog, tying him up, and turning him into her sex slave for a delicious femdom scene.

Mark Davis and Lexi Belle are featured in the final—and most intense—scene. Mark, an experienced player, dominates Lexi, ordering her around and pushing her boundaries, seeing how far she can go before she reaches her limits. It's this scene that has one of the best "teachable moments"—at a particularly intense point, Mark slaps Lexi across the face, which ends up being more than she can take. This leads in to Mark checking in with Lexi, and making sure that she's okay (and okay with continuing), before the two continue playing. It's a nice demonstration of the continuous communication that's an integral part of rough sex—and of the fact that just because someone's reached their limit, it doesn't mean that the entire scene has to be ruined.

All in all, it's an excellent release—though there was one thing we found a little troubling. Though the release limits its discussion of choking to a few voiceovers warning the viewer about the dangers of the practice (and rightly so—there's no such thing as "safe" choking), the performer testimonials are peppered with statements about how great choking is. Granted, the testimonials are intended to depict real life rough sex experiences, and in real life, people choke and experiment with breath play—caution be damned!—but it's an odd juxtaposition to see in an educational release.

[EDIT: Turns out there is an entire mini-feature on the DVD on erotic asphyxiation, which we missed out on cause we had a pre-release copy. Tristan says it's full of talk about risk, risk reduction, and even demonstrations of techniques. Which definitely puts our mind at ease.]

"Penny Flame's Expert Guide To Rough Sex" is a great release for any couple looking to get into rough play—or anyone at all interested in watching some hot, rough sex porn. We've got our fingers crossed that Penny and Tristan are planning a second edition of this expert guide—we'd love to see Penny & co. tackle more advanced rough sex techniques, exploring incorporating toys, tools, and maybe even role play to heighten the experience.

· Buy "Penny Flame's Expert Guide To Rough Sex" (vividsuperstore.com)
· Vivid-Ed (vivid-ed.com)

And not only have they created this helpful video, they've made it even more helpful by eliminating any distraction from, say, stray boobs, or a naked male body, dressing the demo male in a skintight, full body leotard that exposes only the penis, and the penis alone—you know, to really highlight the penis for better demonstration purposes. Brilliant!

These two should take their show on the road. Can you imagine how good they'd be at teaching all those other penis-related lessons? (Answer: totally awesome.)

· Blond wife uses Fleshlight on her slave (pornhub.com)

Penny Flame's Expert Guide to Handjobs for Men & Women

Studio: Vivid
Cast: Penny Flame, Harmony, Justice Young, Anthony Rosano

Review by: Gram Ponante

Ms. Flame proves an excellent teacher in "Penny Flame's Expert Guide to Handjobs for Men & Women," which delivers the sexy without skimping on the science.

Appearing before a multi-ethnic and multigenerational classroom, Flame whips out the visual aids, both tasteful black-and-white drawings and flesh-and-blood subjects Harmony and Justice Young, to demonstrate that handjobs are more than masturbation plus distance.

Flame emphasizes lube, hand hygiene, and taking it slow (but firm) with guest Harmony, who allows Flame to squeeze her labia together for the hushed onlookers ("Don't go straight for the clit before it's warmed up," Flame tells you sternly). But tragedy strikes when Justice Young appears for the male component, because Flame only gets him hard - she doesn't allow a release. That, my friends, is not Justice.

And this is the only drawback to the movie. The 30-minute classroom portion is filmed and edited like an infomercial for softcore late-night cable, with all the applause sound effects, approving audience shots, cheesy voiceover, and canned music. The artifice threatens to overwhelm the naturally compelling Flame and make her seem like more of a prop, when in fact her teaching style - when she's allowed to do it - is helpful and personable.

The infomercial gives way to several annotated hardcore scenes, including one with Flame and Anthony Rosano, that fill out the DVD.

· Vivid (vivid.com)
· Buy "Penny Flame's Expert Guide to Hand Jobs" (gamelink.com)

The adult industry veteran (and the power behind Jenna Jameson's throne) "hopes to bring hope and salvation to the countries growing unemployed and laid-off workers"—all for the low, low price of just $69.69. And that's not just for the book: you'll also get four bonus gifts, including "top secret email" and "private tele-course"!

How could you possibly refuse this once in a lifetime offer?

· Get Into Porn (getintoporn.com)

But since we've been impressed by the previous installments of the Expert Guide series, we figured we'd give this one a shot. And, true to form, Tristan impressed us with her efforts. Rather than setting itself up as the end all, be all of threesomology, the "Expert Guide to Threesomes" acts more as a general guide to group sex.

In the educational intro, Tristan explains different threesome configurations, lays out some basic rules, and goes over different roadblocks and pitfalls encountered by couples looking to have a threesome. While its no guarantee of a problem-free debut into the world of group sex, the "Expert Guide" is a good way for couples to open up a discussion about going beyond a twosome—and even if end up deciding that the threeway isn't your way, you'll still get to watch some hot group sex porn.

· Vivid-Ed (vivid-ed.com)

In partnership with Real Productions (the team behind Playboy TV's "The Boy Nexxt Door"), Cheri will be offering ordinary readers like you—yes, you—the chance to debut in a Real Productions video. There's just one catch: while they're helping you break into the jizz biz (and a few Cheri models too, heh), they'll also be documenting your foray into porn in their brand new "Put You In Porn" column. But hey, how could that possibly go wrong?

· CHERI Offers to 'Put You in Porn' (avn.com)
· Thumbnail from Casting Couch Teens (wannawatch.com, via Ask Jolene)

· First Bi Threesome (firstbithreesome.com, via indienudes.com)

Rub That Snatch!! (pornotube.com)

Claire Masturbation (haporn.com)

· "Exploring The 'O' With Jamye Waxman" (fleshbot.com)

· Getting Off: A Woman's Guide To Masturbation

· Marital Aid Test Kitchen Archive

· Let's Masturbate! (letsmasturbate.com)

*****

· How To Masturbate for Women (haber27.com)

And now, after all that build up, we finally have a copy of "Penny Flame's Expert Guide To Handjobs for Men and Women" in our hands (heh). Was it worth the wait? Our impressions (and a preview gallery) after the jump.

In many ways, Penny Flame's take on the "Expert Guide" series really is the best of both worlds: Penny is an eager (and adorable!) teacher, and her warm and funny screen presence and hands-on demonstrations add a lot to the experience. There's certainly something to be said for a teacher who's willing to show as well as tell, if you know what we mean.

As with all of Tristan's Vivid-Ed releases, "Expert Guide to Hand Jobs" features some extremely hot sex scenes that demonstrate just how sexy hands can be (and how proper hand play can help pave the way for other forms of sexy stimulation, too). If you're in a learning mood, watch the scenes with instruction — Penny's voiceovers guide you through different techniques, while Penny Pop-Ups (a Penny-fied take on the trademark Vivid-Ed pop-ups) wander onscreen to offer specific tips and tricks. Already learned your lesson? Watch the scenes without instruction — they're hot enough to stand on their own, too.

While many of the Penny-fied touches are endearing and adorable, at times there's just a little too much cutesy humor. The feature opens with a faux infomercial advertising Penny's skills (complete with co-star testimonials); while funny, it's also a bit over the top and feels unnecessary — especially as the joke is repeated several times throughout the feature.Though the Penny Flame humor certainly livens things up, in excess it's ultimately more distracting than entertaining, and detracts from an otherwise excellent piece of eduporn.

"Penny Flame's Expert Guide" series certainly shows promise, and we have high hopes for future releases (especially the one about rough sex!). We just hope that in her future releases she's able to tone the cutesy jokes down just a smidge and let her natural charm, educational skills, and the hot, hot sex scenes carry the film on their own.

· Vivid-Ed (vivid-ed.com)
· Buy Penny Flame's Expert Guide To Hand Jobs For Men And Women (gamelink.com)