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Followup

Candice Michelle Gets Even Squeakier Clean We've been spending so much time with those screencaps of Candice Michelle's bathtub adventure we pointed you towards yesterday that our fingertips are starting to get all shriveled. But that's nothing compared to what's going to happen now that a crack babe sleuth has tracked them down to the semi-forgotten 2002 classic "Roomate Wanted", in which Candice costars with former “American Gladiator” hopeful Belinda Gavin ... and furnished us with more video evidence to work ourselves up in a lather about.Let's just say that getting shriveled isn't part of our plans. Maybe it's time we took a cold shower anyway? (sporkfu.com)

By the way, before you decide to build your next penis monster for that new Spore game, you should know that the evil overlords who run things will hunt down your creation and kill it ... along with your access. As if building penis monsters wasn't the whole reason that character creator was invented to begin with! (computerandvideogames.com + gamesradar.com)

It's so obvious that we can't believe we didn't include it in our list of potential TV show porn spoofs—but it doesn't matter anyway because "The Partridge Family" is already taken as a porn movie concept. Don't worry, though—every television show that has ever aired will eventually get the XXX treatment, so your favorite will show up sooner or later. (Though we still have dibs on "Porkin' Mindy".) (avn.com)

Everyone loves to read sex advice columns, but did you know that sometimes people actually follow the advice that's given? And what's even more bizarre is that sometimes it actually works! (timeout.com)

Fleshbot PSI: Another Case Closed! Our commenters were all over yesterday's Porn Scene Investigation clip, informing us within minutes of our posting it that the tiger humping video is from director Philip Mond's 1996 art-porn piece "Zazel: The Scent of Love". (Since it's a film with its own unusually detailed Wikipedia page, we guess we shouldn't be surprised. Who knew former Penthouse Pet Sasha Vinni played the tiger?) Nice job, team—we're totally putting all of you up for promotion. (Wikipedia + adultdvdempire.com)

The buyer of that $33 million Lucien Freud nude painting has been revealed to be Roman Abramovich, a Russian oligarch who also owns a British soccer team. If you've ever wondered what oil billionaires do with all that money, there's your answer. (mirror.co.uk)

Still not convinced that the Jimi Hendrix sex tape is the real deal? Well, the man who brokered it tells his side of the story, including where it came from and how they did their research and ... well, it probably still won't convince you one way or another, but at least he tried. (avn.com)

So we guess that wasn't Terrell Owens admiring Vanessa Lee on a Miami street, but some other tall black guy who has been mysteriously cropped out of the Bang Bros. preview photo for no reason at all. It was an honest mistake! (Deadspin)

Oh, that hardcore Hannah Hilton scene we told you about last week? It's now live on RealWifeStories.com, and even from the limited preview it looks to us like it was worth the wait. (Also: Hannah Hilton is married? Who knew?) (realwifestories.com)

In case you haven't already gone to the library and done this yourself, here's a shot-by-shot comparison of the Lindsay Lohan/Marilyn Monroe photoshoots. If you happen to find a video of a Marilyn lookalike giving a blowjob, let us know. (ifitshipitshere.blogspot.com)

Internet sleuths have tracked down the video where that alleged Lindsay Lohan blowjob picture comes from and it's just as we suspected: about four seconds of grainy low-resolution footage of someone you can't identify giving some dude a blowjob. Also, if you listen closely to the garbled audio we believe you can hear a voice saying "Britney Spears is poor." Developing! MORE >>

TMZ has "learned" that 22 minus 5 is 17, but that it's still a totally legal age to film boobies in Florida — and they also met some guy who crosses his heart and hopes to die that he took the photos of Kristin Davis before they were "sold" and then "stolen." We're so glad to have them around to make our own brand of voyeurism a little less pervy. (tmz.com)

rehash

Everything Else You Wanted To Know About Hookers (But Didn't Care Enough To Ask)

Ashley who? It looks like New York's governor hooker scandal has finally gone from Stage One (shock and outrage) through Stage Two (lurid fascination) and is now firmly in Stage Three: "What does it all mean?" Everyone is bored with Eliot and his escort, and the tri-state area has moved on (or back?) to New Jersey's bisexual gubernatorial threeway scandal. So the rest of the media is now free to pump out feature stories and editorials that deal with "the big picture": sex work and prostitutes, who they are and what they do and why the rest of use can't stop hiring them. Everyone's an expert on sex work all of a sudden, and they're going to teach us all about it for at least another week or so until they likely go back to not caring again. Another exhaustive link roundup is after the jump, though if you're not included in it don't worry: if you're one of the two dozen or so Americans who haven't yet been personally interviewed about this story, we'll be happy to put you in touch with a desperate newspaper editor somewhere who needs your help.

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We knew it was only a matter of time before someone with more ambition—and more knowledge of Hungarian—would dig up more information on the policewoman-pornstar Livia Kovacs. OK, so it's pretty much just blurry screen caps and more indecipherable letters, but at least we know we didn't just dream the whole thing. (borsonline.hu, via pestiside.hu + adultfyi.com)

Diablo Cody Scandalized By Non-Scandalous Nude Scandal Oscar winner Diablo Cody is outraged at the nude photo dust up that's rocking the internet—mostly because she's not getting credit for "leaking" the pictures herself. "I personally put my vag out there with pride, ladies and gents. And you bet your ass I'd do it again if the Beef Council would cough up the proper endorsement money." No word on if she plans to sic her lawyers on herself. (myspace.com)

Gene Simmons continues his "garbage from my past" line of defense regarding the sex tape that he claims is "decades old" and part of an ongoing blackmail attempt. Honestly, we don't know why anyone would ever accuse Gene Simmons of being some sort of sexual animal. (Idolator + Copyranter)

more notes on a scandal

(Still More Than You Ever Wanted To Know About) The Gene Simmons Sex Tape: The Plot Thickens

To no one's surprise, Gene Simmons has lawyered up and gone knocking at the doors of sites that have reported on a certain sex tape scandal that erupted this week ... including our silicon-headed sibling Valleywag, who have just posted a cease-and-desist letter from his legal team which claims among other things that the tape was surreptitiously filmed by a woman named Traci Anna Koval but that Gene's company "Allied Industry" purchased all the rights to the tape back in 2003 presumably to keep it hush-hush. (Got all that?) However, a "spokesman" for the company currently selling the tape told XBiz earlier this week that it was shot nine months ago ... and that Simmons was completely unaware of its existence. It it possible that someone is not being completely honest here? Shocking! But wait ... there's more!
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In case you haven't checked in on this post in the last three or four hours, New York magazine has "found" some more Lindsay Lohan as Marilyn Monroe pictures and appended them to their previous slideshow. How convenient! (nymag.com)