The counters, the mirrors, the shower, the tub, the toilet, the floor... The possibilities are endless. Don't stop with what you see in these ten videos! Get creative (and film it, and send it to us.).

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Of course, we're pretty sure everyone knew when we were getting it on, too. These ten videos make us nostalgic for the linoleum floors, the uniform wood furniture, and the narrow, extra-long twin beds. It also makes us appreciate the queen-sized mattress we have now.

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We're not sure why it is that these videos seem to be so incredibly rare. But whenever we stumble upon one, it's like a divine gift from our heavenly mother. Our porn loving heavenly mother.

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Maybe it has something to do with our childhood fondness for squeaky toys. (Or maybe not. Freud doesn't work for Fleshbot, people.)

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So take a look at these polychromatic pornos and let us know if you think this is just like "Blackzilla," or if it's simply...true to life.

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People generally either love or hate pregnancy porn; we here at Fleshbot fall into the former camp, and we hope you do too. After all, what could be sexier than the constant reminder that you got some?

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These ten couples put morning wood to good use. And all that natural light guarantees we can see everything they've got going on. What a day for a daydream!

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Yes, let it wash all your cares away...and remember: no matter how hard the daily grind gets, at the end of the day, you can always come back to this. (As many times as you like!)

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And hey, even if it's a little late for Valentine's, you can still make that special someone happy for Steak and Blowjob Day or Cake and Cunnilingus Day! After all, there's no bad time for love, and—as you're about to see—there are so many stimulating locations for love-making.

· Cover star: Lavish Styles, via Big Naturals (realitykings.com)

For the traditional couple...

What could be better than staying in bed all day for Valentine's Day? Well, for starters, the bed could be a rental so you don't have to clean up. And better yet, the bed could be a cave, or a sarcophagus, or it could even reflect your gambling addiction. Thanks to FantaSuites, the only limit is your imagination!

If you want the hotel room without the theme, that's cool, too. Many hotels have begun stocking their Mini Bars and room service menus with Intimacy Kits. They're usually stocked with condoms, lube, and perhaps breath mints. The Gansevoort Hotel in New York City supplies a "Mile High Kit" for $20 that includes the aforementioned plus massage oils, a personal massager, and a feather tickler.

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· The Gansevoort (hotelgansevoort.com)

If you're not afraid to trade...

Hit the high seas with a boatload of swingers! If you've been forging a solid relationship based on trust and respect, then you should be able to swap partners with complete strangers on a cruise ship. The good people of SwingersCruise.com organize excursions like these on boats big and small, so remember that not everyone on your ship is there to swing.

· SwingersCruise.com | Cruises for Swingers (swingerscruise.com)
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Because the journey is the destination...

Maybe you don't feel like going anywhere, or maybe you're obligated to go on a business trip somewhere boring. That's ok! Take your partner along with you and join the Mile High Club! But don't do it on any old plane, we recommend Virgin America.

Why Virgin? For starters, the sleek purple/pink mood lighting reflecting off the leather and hard white plastic creates a bizarre nightclub feel that is both soothing and exciting. And since every seat sports a keyboard you can use in the onboard chatroom, you can spit game at fly honeys in first class without pushing past the stewardess.

If all else fails, you can watch great films on their interactive media player, Red. The last time one of our editors took Virgin, an extended viewing of "Lust, Caution" motived him to join the Mile High Club (Solo Aviator Division).

· Virgin America (virginamerica.com)
· Pic via Hungarian Honeys (nshoneys.com)

For the love that gives your heart license to soar...

Is turbulent lavatory love not your thing? Have sex in a zero gravity environment! In the now classic film, "Private Black Label: The Uranus Experiment," Silvia Saint sucks off Nick Lang while the pair is on a free falling plane. Obviously, the best part about going to space is getting your weightless rocks off, so why not recreate the experience? Buy you and your loved one a ticket on a commercial Vomit Comet.

The Zero Gravity Corporation offers such flights for reasonable (er, enormous) prices. Your ticket includes 12-15 parabolic free falls, your own flight suit, extra swag, a certificate of weightless completion, and photos and video of your unique experience (so you can quickly and efficiently upload your romantic time to XTube). Best of all, no cleanup! It's not your specially modified Boeing 727.

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If you've got a thing for having sex in the bathroom...

Mildred's Temple Kitchen, a restaurant in Toronto, is pimping its bathrooms out as perfect perches for Valentine's Day trysts. Toronto Public Health officials say they're cool with it, and the restaurant even said they'd provide a maid to keep it extra clean.

Sadly, soon after the offer went out, Mildred's said they were joking. Nonetheless, they are offering a special menu rich with aphrodisiac oyster hors d'oeuvres and special "Lady and the Tramp"-style spaghetti and meatballs served on one plate. For a nominal fee, they also provide a gift basket of cookies, pecan squares, and a pair of fuzzy handcuffs. So maybe they were joking, but we say take the handcuffs to the bathroom and show them what a happy Valentine's Day really is.

· Mildred's Temple Kitchen (templekitchen.com)
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Honestly, they could release "Real Indian Lady Bus Drivers" or "Real Indian Carpet Saleswomen" or even "Real Indian Women Who Like To Have Sex On Camera," and we'd be happy. The take away here is that we want to see more Indian women doing the sex on camera. Okay?

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Throughout the fourteen (fourteen!) minutes of this video, we're taken through a virtual Kama Sutra of positions, as we go over, under, behind, side by side...even positions we don't know the name of (not that those are that hard to come up with). And then, finally—breathing rapid, heart rate accelerated—we climax with that ever rewarding orgasm...and that blissful moment of peace.

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Have sex with her? Oh! That makes sense. Well, luckily that other guy has it under control. On another note: she is making some outrageous noises. It's just the best.

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*****

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What? You thought we were going talk about communing with nature or something? Please.

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