Considering how many people have lost their jobs, homes, and health insurance, we have to wonder if people are simply attaching themselves sexually to the wholesome and safe image of motherhood as a source of comfort and safety. Now if only we could get a decent medium to help us part the veil of death so we could get Freud's opinion...hmmm.

Whether or not there's a direct link between the harsh economic times we are living through and the rise in MILF titles, we may never know. Ultimately we'll have to leave that kind of speculation to magic number crunching genius Nate Silver.

While Nate works on that, we'd like to take time out to enjoy New Sensations latest MILFtastic offering, "Big Mommy Boobs 6," which we would have personally called "Journey into Jugland" if we were in charge over there.

Sienna West, Austin Kincaid, Diamond Foxxx, Holly Sampson, Sheila Marie, Devon Lee, Carolyn Reese, Morgan Reigns, Kristina Cross, Lucky Benton, and Brittany O'Connell comprise the twelve scenes offered in the two disc collector's set. We love that. Collector's set. We're trying to picture which hardcore fan has these titles up in their glass menagerie right now, next to their Taco Bell Star Wars collector's edition frosty mugs and the three legged buffalo nickel they found in their change drawer.

Pretty much every single girl in this movie blew our minds with their massive melons and tight mommy bodies. True. In the end, we gave some extra attention to redhead (shocking) Sienna West and blonde beauty Holly Sampson. These mommies really rev our engine.

"Big Mommy Boobs 6" releases today from New Sensations. Check out our exclusive gallery.

New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
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New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
New Sensations (newsensations.com)

That's because in less than a week Wicked Pictures will be declassifying all of their files on "Operation Tropical Stormy"—which is their high tech way of saying they're releasing the movie. Shot in such exotic locations as Hawaii and Chatsworth, OTS is the fiscally irresponsible sequel to Stormy's blockbuster porn epic—"Operation Desert Stormy."

Once again, secret agents Rachel and George (Stormy Daniels and Evan Stone) are paired up. Having just saved the world and been promoted, they reward themselves with a relaxing cruise that leaves them stranded on a jaguar and sex-crazed cannibal infested jungle hellhole. Oh, and it's also the secret lair of North Korean playboy dictator Kim Jong-Il. Despite the incredible duress they are perpetually under (with the threat of imminent death comically lurking behind every single moment on the island), the two manage to squeeze in just about as much ball-draining, snatch-quenching fuck action as a couple of horny honeymooners at a swingers convention in Jamaica.

Joining Miss Daniels and Mister Stone are a burgeoning cast of morally uninhibited young strumpets including Anabelle Lee, Nikki Rhodes, Devon Lee, Gianna Lynn, Mikayla Mendez, Mya Luanna, Shyla Stylez, Sammy Rhodes, Carolyn Reese, Havana Ginger, Renae Cruz, Desiree Diam, Mia Lelani, and Bella Ling. A cast of that size seems like reason enough to give this monster a look.

Whether or not this sequel will pack the punch of its predecessor, which garnered such lofty awards as AVN's 2008 "Best Comedy", XRCO's 2008 "Best Director", Nightmove's "First Choice," and 2008 Empire Award's "Best Overall DVD", "Best Feature", "Editor's Choice Best Video" and "Viewer's Choice Best Video", we cannot say. For now, we're just too busy pouring over the embarrassment of riches they included in promotional materials and waiting for our Operation Tropical Stormy Coconut Rum Flavored Lube to arrive—which should be here any minute now.

"Operation Tropical Stormy" floods onto streets at high tide next week. Check out our exclusive sneak peek now. And to Stormy Daniels we say—good luck with both this amazing looking movie and your Senate bid!

Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
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Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Carolyn Reese, Sierra Skye, Riley Evans, Brooke Banner, and Sara Stone join forces as a crime fighting team of big breasted, silicone-free, super ninja, cock craving ball drainers intent on ridding the world of semen, one slurp at a time.

When an evil syndicate of endowed criminal geniuses attempt destroy to capitalism by systematically replacing American pennies with Canadian ones, it's up to these quivering beauties to milk their ambitions clean out of them—and bring them to justice!

All right, so maybe we made that last part up. The truth is, there's no real plot. Just boobs, and big ones, too—the size of your head! Personally, we don't need any distractions from the jugs—but you be the judge.

"Big Natural Tits 3" is a brand spanking new release from Sin City. We get so thirsty just looking at 'em.

Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
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Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)
Sin City Films (sincityfilms.com)

Oh, wait, that's right—she actually might be. But she's not! Which is good, because when she veers into conversations with more depth and political commentary, we tend to get a little lost. Better to leave that to our dear friends over at Wonkette and Daily Kos. For now, we're more than content to treat this stunning blonde sex goddess like the glorious sex object that she is.

Her latest effort, "The Lifestyle," centers around a story porn plot (after all, this is Wicked) featuring a couple desperate to save their fizzled marriage, trying all kinds of inventive ways to return the spark to their sex life. When everything else fails, they finally turn to their friends who can't stop dry humping each other's legs in public. What's the secret to their happy marriage? Wait for it... SWINGING!

Does it all work out? Who cares? Seriously—each scene has at least two girls in it having the time of their young life getting drilled open, all hot and juicy. We gave up on most of the plot lines in these movies a while ago anyway, and we'd venture a guess that we aren't alone in that decision.

Swing masters Voodoo and Nicole Sheridan join in along with Kaylani Lei, Adrianna Nicole, Roxy DeVille, Mackenzee Pierce, Carolyn Reese, Tori Black, and smoldering hot retired redhead Jayme Langford.

Check out our free sneak peek gallery. "The Lifestyle" comes out this week from Wicked Pictures.

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

But which MILF title out of the slushy sea of MILF titles should we select to get us through another week of bailouts and Senate hearings and bank failures, you ask? Why not chose one with a compelling historical narrative? (Yeah. We went there.) And that is where "MILF Seekers 15" comes into the picture. Brace yourselves...cause here it comes.

Ever since noted plagiarist and best selling "author" Dan Brown regaled us with his Christ conspiracy theories, and Tom Hanks lulled us into a gentle sleep with the hilarious movie version, it seems as though everyone and their mother is suddenly an expert on the Knights Templar. Just last week, we overheard heady conversations about the shadowy roots of their origins, blended with hearty doses of myth and liberal anachronisms sung between two of the thickest hillbilly accents we've ever heard dredged out of the family swamp. (To paraphrase Will Ferrell playing former "President" George W. Bush, we didn't know it was amateur historian night!)

A lesser known but far more compelling myth, in our esteemed opinion, is that of the "MILF Seeker," as presented to us from the renowned scholars over at Pink Visual. According to an "invented" legend, the MILF Seekrers are a party of rakish rogues who scoured the land, far and wide, eagerly hunting not for gold or silver but for to collect carnal knowledge of the sexiest, sluttiest matriarchs the world had to offer.

Thousands of years later, the legend still lives on, as well-endowed warriors whip it out to fuck a new sextet of magnificent MILFtastiticness, then deposit huge silky loads of pearly white cum all up inside of them or baptize them in hot spew.

What? You people were the ones that believed the Da Vinci Code—and that retarded movie didn't even have hot fucking! "MILF Seekers 15" has April Blossom, Dakota Reed, Sheila Marie, Carolyn Reese, and hot as fuck Jordan Nevaeh. We'll take that any day over a bunch of old dudes conspiring to hide the fact that Jesus and Mary had French children.

"MILF Seekers 15" releases this week from Pink Visua. Please just don't go around the mall or nail salons the rest of the week dressed like a Knight talking in Middle English, because that would be bad.

· Pink Visual (pinkvisual.com)

If anything, we're surprised not that he's putting out a new release cleverly titled “King of Coochie," but that it took him this long to figure it out. We've known that about you for years, Tom.

Byron packs his first release with some of the names we've grown to love over the last, um, year... including Tori Black, Dakoda Brookes, Savannah Stern, Shayne Ryder, and Carolyn Reese. His publicist was quick to remind us that “coochie” is a healthy part of a daily diet and that it contains no trans fat or MSG—something we try to avoid while fulfilling our snatch habit.

One thing is undoubtedly clear: Byron lords over the hot young harlots in this all sex release, taking unmistakable joy in slamming long and deep into their tight pink boxes. This is one man who really loves his job—and it shows! Good for you, Tom, and good luck!

"King of Coochie" streets today from Evolution Distribution.

· Evolution Distribution (evolutiondist.com)

Dulcet darling Aiden Starr illustrates what having a “sword fight” in your mouth really means (in ways heretofore only possible in anime). The intrepid blonde with the knockout body displays a bottomless rapaciousness, one which compels her to unimaginable heights of sexual gluttony as she devours enough man meat to put Takeru Kobayashi to shame. Accompanying her with equal vigor, and wantonness, are a choir of lusty angels whose oral convictions are equaled only by their ineffable allure.

Rayveness offers compelling evidence of her unique talent, satisfying a throbbing quiver of cock without ever losing that hypnotic stare. Similarly dirty beauty Charley Chase bears witness to an extraordinary hunger for a degree of deviance and perversion we have grown to expect from our starlets. Add to that Carolyn Reese, Emma Heart, Claire Dames, Charlotte Vale, and Rebecca Lane, and you've got over 3 hours of mind numbing talent fulfilling the promise that porn has sown from the start: that these girls lovingly perform acts at which average women balk. Isn't that what it's really all about?

Well done, Mike Johns. Well done.

"Sperm Receptacles 4" releases this week from Jules Jordan Video. Don your raincoats and bear witness.

· Jules Jordan Video (julesjordanvideo.com)

Each scene features a minimum of two sultry anal starlets, both crowding around the dusky tumescence of a swarthy swordsman before taking turns stretching each and every orifice with the ample genital offerings that John provides. The results are nothing short of wonderful to watch.

The omnipresent Jada Fire joins Adrianna Nicole, Bobbi Starr, Riley Evans, Carolyn Reese, Fleshbot Crush Object Dana DeArmond, Claire Dames, Charley Chase, Charlotte Vale, and Chayse Evans in this epicurean adventure of cum swapping.

. . .

· "Semen Sippers 7" (julesjordanvideo.com)

Despite its quasi-religious marketing concept, "Praise The Load 2" doesn't adhere to any particular dogma aside from the one which dictates that every money shot in a porn flick needs must end up deposited in the mouth of a willing supplicant. Which is something even dedicated heathens like us can take on faith.

"Praise The Load 2" hits the shelves this week.

• "Praise The Load 2" (more pics + DVD info @ julesjordanvideo.com)

Then again, do people really pay much attention to porn titles except to make fun of them like we do? After all, the main thing you need to know about the movie is that it stars a bevy of porn beauties of more than ample proportions, including Jordan Star, Carolyn Reese, Laylah Diamond, Riley Evans, and the lovely Monica Foster in addition to aforementioned Fleshbot Crush Object™ Gianna. And in that regard, the title is perfect at least in that it contains the word "breast" in it.

So maybe Everhard was right after all. We'll just stick to writing for you from now on.

• "Breast Meat" (DVD info + more pics @ julesjordanvideo.com)

Watch Bobbi Starr juggling large black balls while balancing between two giant rods! Thrill to the sight of Emilianna and Carolyn Reese performing death-defying feats of cunnilingus! Marvel as Ricki White and Rucca Page make one man’s meat completely disappear within their fleshy confines—and you won't believe how Velicity Von and her sexy assistant Lexi Love manage to charm Sean Michaels' raging python into submission!

Of course, you won't see Ashley Blue pulling a string of large anal beads from her nether reigons before getting tongue fucked by Melissa Lauren in any big top we know of. After all, this ain't your usual greatest show on earth.

• "Anal Beach Buns" (DVD info @ evilangel.com)

The latest contender to throw their OP board shorts into the ring is Sin City Entertainment: not only does their new logo remind us of the sort of typography we used to see on muscle car posters in Spencer Gifts, but they've even gone ahead and recycled the title of both Nick Zedd's seminal 1988 art porn short and a still-current all-girl series by DVSX for their new feature! And director Ariella takes this regression one step further by blending a mixture of established performers with relative newcomers in "Whorgasm", which stars Chennin Blanc, Ginger Blaze, Jennifer Dark, Mina Lee, Carolyn Reese, and Holly Wellin. (OK., we guess dropping that E does make it a completely different title. Still.)

Alas, the only other thing really interesting about "Whoregasm" aside from its rad box cover is that awesome title—it's certainly not that hoary pre-"Boogie Nights"-era plotline involving high-priced call girls and the affluent and powerful men who pay for them. And the often tepid performances don't help matters much either. Still, we at least found the preview pics diverting enough to share with you here and see if the power of free porn still counts for anything. Let us know how they work out for you.

· Sin CIty's "Whorgasm" (sincityfilms.com)

From the press release: "I was sitting around thinking in all my years in the biz, all the sex scenes I've done, what is the best part of the experience, the ultimate? Well, that would be when one girl is sucking my cock and another is eating my ass. Or, one girl sitting on my face and the other eating my ass. Or, two girls eating my ass at once... you get the idea! I thought, 'why not make a movie about it?' And so Asseaters Unanimous 16: Dinner for Two was born."

We assure you that these are Before photos.

"Asseaters Unanimous 16" also stars Jandi Lin, Jada Fire, Angel Eyes, Naudia Nyce, Darryl Hanah, Flower Tucci, Carolyn Reese, Roxy DeVille, Adrianna Nicole, Holly Wellin, Dana DeArmond, and Paris Gables.

We are sorry that we have nothing else to tell you about this movie, since we're already late for dinner for the rest of our lives.

· Evolution Distribution (evolutiondist.com)

"MILFstravaganza 4" doesn't settle the question one way or the other. Fortunately, in this case such matters of taxonomy are besides the point: when it comes to watching the likes of Abby Rode, Austin Kincaid, Carolyn Reese, Devon Lee, Aline, India Summer and their ilk in action, who needs silly niche labels anyway?

(Everything, however, is hotter in porn when it has the suffix "-stravaganza" attached to it. That's just a scientific fact.)

· Digital Sin/New Sensations (newsensations.com)