Bree's Anal Invasion

Studio: Adam & Eve
Director: Andre Madness
Cast: Bree Olson, Missy Stone, Andi Anderson, Kristina Rose, Rebeca Linares, James Deen, Evan Stone, Tommy Gunn, Mick Blue, Danny Mountain

Bree Olson, Supreme Commandress of this ass-hungry quintet of space ladies, kicks things off with a visit to the home of Mick Blue. Wielding a large machine gun yet remaining totally silent, Bree still manages to convey her desires - and thank goodness for that. Once the ass-play begins Bree sheds the silent treatment, imploring Mick for a taste of cock then coaxing him directly into an anal plunging.

Next comes Kristina Rose, who comes... and comes... with the help of Tommy Gunn. In this scene there are plenty of fullscreen close-ups - giving us eyefuls of quivering, dripping cock, cunt, and ass. Following is Andi Anderson, who, together with James Deen, displays some rousing couch acrobatics... with enough dirty talk and cum to both impress and satisfy. The beautiful Rebeca Linares, paired with Evan Stone, and Missy Stone with Danny Mountain complete the lineup, bringing us in at just over two hours of solid ass-lovin'.

Described as a "campy, outer-space sex comedy," Bree's Anal Invasion doesn't disappoint... If you're into anal in abundance, this flick's for you. And with an extensive bonus features section offering up goods such as a bonus sex scene (showcasing Dan Silver's "Beautiful Anal Divas 2"), a photo gallery, interviews, outtakes, and an intriguing look behind the scenes, there's enough here to keep anyone happily occupied for hours. Another winning combination for Andre Madness and the relentless Bree Olson.

Bree Olson and Mick Blue
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Andi Anderson and James Deen
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Andi Anderson and James Deen
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Kristina Rose and Tommy Gunn
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Kristina Rose and Tommy Gunn
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Kristina Rose and Tommy Gunn
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Kristina Rose and Tommy Gunn
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Kristina Rose and Tommy Gunn
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Missy Stone and Danny Mountain
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Missy Stone and Danny Mountain
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Rebeca Linares and Evan Stone
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Rebeca Linares and Evan Stone
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Lucky for us (and Mr. Rosano), touching Bree doesn't cause you to explode in flames, there's only a slight melting sensation. You may also experience sweating, dizziness, weak knees, euphoria, and a sudden affinity for footjobs. We recommend not using heavy machinery during exposure to Bree. Unless you're using your computer to watch her, then you kind of can't help it.

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* * * * *

Previously: Reapplying Sunscreen Will Not Protect You From "Bree Exposed"

Which explains (in part) why they've released a four plus hour title starring some of your favorite cock gargling starlets, back when they were fresh and new and nearly factory sealed, their young hearts and vaginas still as indestructible like those famous plastic combs from our childhoods.

"Cum Fuck Them Young" is more than just a compilation video starring Bree Olson, Amy Ried, Ava Rose, Lacie Heart, Riley Mason, Audrey Bitoni, Carmen Kinsley, Chase Dasani, Krystal Jordan, Lindsey Meadows, Ruby Flame, Samantha Sin, and Stefanie Renee—it's also an invitation to recall those halcyon days of yonder, fleeting quickly into life's rear view mirror as we push ever further towards the great equalizer. It's one great big "carpe diem" shouted up into the face of the howling abyss, a double finger superhero salute to the darkness that threatens to strip all meaning away from this brief and wonder filled dream.

Is that too morbid? Welcome to the winter of our discontent. It's been a wild year, one where we lost too many we cherished. That being said, "Cum Fuck Them Young" is also a reminder to grab life by the tail, to chuck out that which is truly non-essential, and to embrace our animal instincts right here and now.

Seeing young and vibrant Ava Rose have her tight and tiny clam pried open again takes us back. Likewise, it fills the cockles of our hearts with joy to see a thin, bubbly Bree Olson get nailed in the ass—almost as if it is her very first time. With so many amazing starlets doing what we have grown to love them for, this release is like the "family-sized" value saver equivalent of a pornographic Costco—which is fine from time to time.

"Cum Fuck Them Young" releases next week from New Sensations. Check out this awesome gallery, exclusive to Fleshbot, then go out and seize the day!

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Mr. Sponge escorted fellow Southerner Stormy Daniels to the AVN Awards a few years back, so we knew he was of the populist "Jackass" variety of radio hosts, and he has since released several editions of his uncut studio exploits with porn stars and hapless employees.

"But this Bree bitch wasn't believing that Steve was blind," huffs Bubba.

Probably because he wasn't.

The idea was that Olson would be introduced to employee Steve, decked out in sunglasses and walking stick, and perhaps feel sympathetic enough to his condition that she would give him a handjob.

But she wasn't buying it.

"I think you guys are messing with me," she says. "I don't think he's really blind."

Radio interviews with mass market DJs are still among the gold rings of porn publicity, so Olson puts up with the ruse for a while, and then, in a clear gesture of "Whatever," she begins texting. Moments later, she exits the Florida studio and walks at a clip down the road, pursued by a cameraman and another Sponge minion.

"Then she had a total meltdown!" Bubba drawls.

Olson grabs the camera and won't let go, demanding to get the tape. Sponge underlings give her a blank tape and make their getaway.

"Bubba Raw 4" features various segments of nudity a la "Girls Gone Wild" and cruelty to employees a la Howard Stern, but it's not as entertaining or as original, and that's saying a little. Sorry you had to deal with that, Bree.

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Bree Exposed

Studio: Adam & Eve
Director: Andre Madness
Cast: Bree Olson, Ava Rose, Jenny Hendrix, Missy Stone, Charlie Laine, Danny Mountain, Anthony Rosano, Tommy Gunn, Mick Blue

Bree Olson only appears in two scenes! I know I'm being greedy, but I was hoping for more. Naturally, the quality of her scenes more than makes up for the quantity, as Bree is a powerful force in her respective segments with Anthony Rosano and Tommy Gunn.

Since Anthony has the first scene, you'd expect him to set the pace for the rest of the actors. While his unchained fucking certainly typifies the wild tone of the film, I wouldn't designate him the golden standard of "Bree Exposed." Mr. Rosano gets very, very sweaty. Like, just-got-caught-in-a-monsoon sweaty. Also, he finishes by jacking off on Bree's feet and I wasn't prepared for it. Maybe that's a good thing?

The following four scenes are also wet and surprising, but in different ways. Mick Blue brings Missy Stone to squirt before embarking on a long anal engagement. Then there's a lesbian intermission with Ava Rose and Charlie Laine involving a rather ornate but uncomfortable-looking chair. Next, Bree seduces Tommy with an oh-so sensuous booty dance. Finally, Jenny Hendrix and Danny Mountain use the only bed in the movie for some very intense reverse cowgirl action.

As hot as all of the performers are, I felt the sound was the sexiest part of the movie. One moment you're listening to Bree describe the prodigious veins of Tommy's cock (prodigious, by the way), and the next, you're eavesdropping on the whispers between Jenny and Danny. It really says something when you can enjoy a porno with your eyes closed.

The only thing that soured my audio love affair was the ambient music. Before every scene you're treated to either an Enya techno remix or Gregorian chant-break beats. A minor concern, but it causes me to wonder what overall feel Andre Madness wanted to impart.

The straight story is this: there are five hot scenes that stand out strong against any environmental oddities that may exist. With every new scene, you can feel yourself getting excited, impatient, and just generally happy to see the performers. It's that Christmas-morning feeling that can't be faked, and it comes from the talent and enthusiasm of the actors.

And that's why I want to see more of Bree Olson: you can stare at her for hours and it won't damage your retinas.

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You'd think compilation porn DVDs would be the best of the best, but often they are not; the sheer amount of material available often works against the better angels of a company's nature, and the consumer is left with something less thought out, even, than regular porn.

But "Lexington Loves Huge White Tits" is not only an excellent compilation but it is also a mini-history of famous and lamentably obscure porn talent over the past half-decade which shows why Steele is still at the top of his game and why huge white tits have been the cornerstone of Western Civilization.

There's very little tease, no story at all, and it appears that some of the women are wearing recycled outfits their counterparts might have worn in earlier scenes, but who cares? Viewers are treated to spirited performances from Sara Jay and Gianna Michaels, as well as a number of healthy, phat-bootied caucasians we haven't seen in a while and who have disappeared into the ether, like the bewitching Texas (not to be confused with Alexis Texas).

Not only that, but we also get Belladonna, whose breasts aren't that big, per se, but she is Belladonna.

Even though Bree's is arguably the most famous name in the bunch (and her scene, shot at least three years ago, shows exactly why she is in a long-lasting contract), it is the trysts that make up the middle of this 12-pack that are the most spontaneous, least-studied, and fun.

In the end, it is appararent why Lexington loves huge white tits, and we learn to love them, too.

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The sorority girls are in need of cash and they call in Bree Olson to help save their house. Her solution? She turns them into whores.

You may say, "Grams—nice cribbing the logline from the boxcover." But I actually watched the movie.

You would think that some of the ladies might be reticent about selling their bodies to save the sorority, but you would be wrong. Have you ever been to Vassar?

No, it takes no convincing at all—just a "Grease"-style montage sequence, to turn these co-eds (the delicious Tori Black, Madison Ivy, and Lexi Belle included) from women who fuck out of boredom and for the remains of the Aftershock to women who fuck for money.

Thanks Bree!

The only beef I have with this film—even its tunebank Hadaway-style score is good—is that Ms. Olson never wears in the movie the outfit she wears on the cover. It was the only reason I opened the box.

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The Five

Studio: Adam & Eve
Director: Andre Madness
Cast: Bree Olson, Alexis Texas, Jenna Haze, Sasha Grey, Shyla Stylez, Johnny Sins, Mr. Pete, James Deen, Scott Nails, Danny Mountain

Review by: Gram Ponante

It is then that you realize that "The Five" is not supposed to be a porn version of "The 300."

"The Five" is ALSO not about some elite crimefighting team, unless the crime is not having an opportunity to watch Bree Olson and four other women fuck other guys.

Instead (and depending on the household) "The Five" features five of porn's household names in overlapping scenes shot in a pleasant and sunlit modern country home. Nothing special, unless you like those people a lot. Which I do.

For example, Bree opens the movie (and her stems) with a couch-based tease sequence. I hope this is not taken the wrong way, but Olson is a little heavier than the last time I saw her, and the extra weight looks great on her. People can be sensitive about weight, I've heard. When she is done tossing her lingerie at the camera, she and the camera crawl over to Johnny Sins, who happens to have been sitting on the couch all along, just like the Footprints in the famous inspirational poster.

He fucks her. What would you do if Bree Olson crawled over to your side of the couch naked? At least I hope you would fuck her. I'd block you from this URL if you didn't do your best to take advantage of all opportunities.

"Oh my goodness!" Olson yells, adorably.

Then Mr. Pete fucks Sasha Grey in the kitchen.

A few words about Sasha Grey and Mr. Pete: I am prepared to say that their onscreen personae (ice princess, hillbilly) do not accurately represent them. For example, Sasha Grey is delightful to talk with and she laughs a lot, and Mr. Pete is the nicest guy you'd want to meet. When they fuck in the kitchen you can imagine they had lunch afterward (after they'd squeegeed the surfaces).

Later, James Deen encounters Jenna Haze at the bottom of some concrete-and-stainless-steel stairwell at which someone has thoughtfully placed a couch to fuck her on.

I often wonder: What's the big deal about Jenna Haze? But in "The Five" it became clear. She makes excellent eye contact, and that can't be faked.

While the rest of the movie doesn't fizzle (a threesome with Shyla Stylez, Olson, and Digital Playground mainstay Scott Nails, a scene between Alexis Texas and Danny Mountain), I began to wonder about the viability of a title like "The Five." As there was no throughline - other than the house - the "five" only refers to the number of women in it, which is about as useful as renaming a "Reverse Bukkake" "The 17 Who Showed Up."

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Earlier this year, we saw Andrew Blake's "5 Stars", now Adam & Eve have taken up the pentaphilic torch with "The Five," a celebration of five of the porn world's most impressive stars.

The feature is headlined by Bree Olson, who brings her adorable (and dirty) charms to both her scenes (the opener, in which she opens up all her orifices to Johnny Sins, and the fourth scene, in which Bree joins Shyla Stylez and Scott Nails for a delicious threesome). But Bree is hardly the only star in this show: Sasha Grey, Jenna Haze, and Alexis Texas round out the release, with ample dirty talk and hard fucking.

There is no plot—or even a half-hearted attempt at a plot—to "The Five": instead, each performer is introduced with a little striptease, and then immediately cuts to the fuck, er, chase. But it's for the best, really. With a cast of this caliber, there's no need to waste time dressing up the action or providing a backstory: these performers are strong enough to carry the film on their sexual skills alone.

In keeping with its numeric theme, "The Five" releases today—5/5/09. For the sake of numeric consistency, we almost wish it had come out four years ago—but, alas, if it had, we wouldn't have been able to compile this stellar cast.

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Bree's Big Campout

Studio: Adam & Eve
Director: Jim Malibu
Cast: Bree Olson, Faye Reagan, Jenny Hendrix, Alexis Breeze, Annette Allen, Dirty Harry

Review by: Gram Ponante

Bree Olson is going to Arizona. You'd think she'd be crushed by this, but she's not. I experience suicidal ideation whenever I have to go to Arizona. But it's not about me—it's about Bree. Instead, she decides to throw a big campout with her sexy friends!

You see, our Bree just graduated from high school and she's headed to a "really awesome" school in Arizona for pre-med.

I will not bore you with the details of how Olson, Faye Reagan, Jenny Hendrix, Alexis Breeze, and Annette Allen become naked in tents, on blankets, and in pools. Just know that they do, and that's all that matters.

"Bree's Big Campout" is the type of porn movie that can be remade every two years with different people; it is a perfect example of a wholesome adult movie you'd want to include with anyone's 18th birthday card.

Everyone looks good in this movie, particularly Olson, Jenny Hendrix, and Alexis Breeze (though we do fear they're going to burst into flame and/or get sand in their parts) and the chapters are set apart by clever vlog entries by the characters. There is even a cameo by Dirty Harry as a creepy park ranger. Unlike his appearances in JM movies, Harry does not spend his time in "Bree's Big Campout" weeping or screaming.

As cross-country rival Digital Playground is cleaning up on occupation-based fetishes like nurses, babysitters, and cheerleaders, I think Adam & Eve should capitalize on events. I'd love to see Kayden Kross doing a timeshare pitch porn or barbecue flick, and maybe Bree can follow "Campout" with "Bree's Big Bachelorette Party."

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Whores D'oeuvre

Studio: Daring
Director: Christoph Clark
Cast: Zafira, Trisha Brill, Regina Ice, Halana, Dorina Golden, Samantha, Brandy, Crystal Crown, Sera Passion, Viviene, Indira, Anita Pearl, Angelicka Black, Britney, Jennifer Love, Valentina Blue,

Review by: Gram Ponante

It is hard not to love this movie. People who might normally be turned off by aggressive European porn and its disaffected performers need not worry about director Christoph Clark's ability to connect; each setup is whimsical and weird and he fills each scene with bits of business that are mostly absent from American porn movies.

A woman teaching a blowjob class passes dildos around the room, a bondage slave has her leather hood splooged upon, nurses gangbang other nurses in a HMO-erotic hookup, and lovers choose to screw in a limo when there is a perfectly good bed in the same room.

Clark delivers gonzo scenes with just a whiff of plot, suddenly making women who would otherwise seem inaccessible to New World audiences much more present, especially with an intriguing, not distracting, circling camera style.

It would be fun to see Belladonna or Bree Olson walk into one of these scenes; the culture clash would be very sexy. But Clark really succeeds in making euro porn fun.

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One Last Ride

Studio: Adam & Eve
Director: David Lord
Cast: Bree Olson, Tori Black, Mia Lelani, Jamie Lamore, Ben English, Chris Johnson, Barrett Blade, Derrick Pierce

Review by: Gram Ponante

"My father told me, just before he died, to never mix blood and money," says Marco (Barrett Blade) to Bree Olson (who plays the character Bree) while explaining why he can't tell her what he does for a living. Then he dies. And somebody who says stupid stuff like that? I'm glad he's dead.

But Bree has lost her sugar daddy, and must make ends meet the only way she can. She hooks up with an even sketchier crowd, and becomes a car-boosting criminal stealing high-end vehicles for a limey crime lord (Ben English).

But as her crew of thieving hotties becomes more accomplished, Bree gets in over her head. She can only compensate by putting her ankles back there, too.

Does Bree learn to mix blood and money? I'm not sure, but given the mortality rate in this movie of people who say that, I'm glad she chooses not to utter those words, thus preserving her glorious pinkening fleshmass another day.

But what about tender, lesbian love? Oh yes: she figures that out. At the expense of all the men in the film, Bree discovers that a woman's affection is her personal rehabilitation program.

"One Last Ride" was shot beautifully, with lots of nighttime Los Angeles competing with the landscapes of Olson, Tori Black, Jamie Lamore, and Mia Lelani. There was also an utterly non-Adam & Eve-like stripper's ass-based coke-snorting sequence. But in porn I believe that the noir is inside us - I don't need to hear people externalizing it through dialogue; it's like capri pants on the wrong person.

"One Last Ride," a sort of "Thelma And Louise in 60 Seconds"-meets-"Oliver!" with extra scoops of Bree, is like the late-nite crime caper you endure hoping there will be sex in it that actually has sex in it. It is only later that you wish you'd forwarded through the rest of the stuff.

· Adam & Eve (afameve.com)
· Buy "One Last Ride" (gamelink.com)

New Sensations' "I Love 100th Edition," a 4-disc set containing 12 hours of scenes from Jenny Hendrix to Bree Olson to Shawna Lenee to Tia Tanaka to Ashlynn Brooke to Cassandra Calogera to Lorena Sanchez (and about 25 more names you'd recognize) underlines the opinion that, in the end, it is not stars but quantity of flesh that will help porn survive the economic downturn.

(Of course, the other opinion is that it is only the occasional emergence of someone with star quality that keeps porn afloat. It might be a little of both.)

In any case, this DVD set is a testament to the power of the quantity platform, and I have chosen to include pictures of weirdly-placed feet in addition to a large gallery. Enjoy!

. . .

· New Sensations (newsensations.com)
· Buy "I Love 100th Edition" (gamelink.com)

Referencing puerile classics like "Raging Balls," "The Wizard of Cunt," "Live Free & Fuck Hard," "Fucks With Wolves," "Diddler on the Roof," "One Fucked Over the Cuckold's Nest," "Midnight Cowgirl," "Schindler's Fist," and the Japanese tentacle porn themed musical "The Sound of Hard Fucking," the girls eventually review spoof scenes crafted around such pornified titles as "Hairy Pussy & the Sorcerer's Bone," "E.T.: The Extra Testicle," "Spiderpussy," and "A Cock In Lips Now" before turning on each other in a juicy display of sapphic authenticity assured to curl toes and melt your new high definition screen.

What kind of antics does the movie include? Well, for starters, Bree's especially entertaining as a military assassin sent to the jungles of Southeast Asia to liquidate Col. Dick Hurtz, played convincingly enough by the muscle bound stud Tommy Gunn. In the process of trying to fuck each other within an inch of their beautiful lives, they nearly demolish the set (accidents will happen!). Madison Scott plays a particularly emotionally unbalanced super heroine in "Spiderpussy," unleashing a hauntingly ferocious sexual performance on Evan Stone. Fleshbot Crush Object Shawna Lenee beefs up her international relations credentials (pun well intended) with Latin born Marco, and manages to tackle thorny national security issues at the same time—with her tiny, wet, pink butterfly! (Lou Dobbs would be impressed!) And last but not least, Dane Cross apes a popular bespectacled young wizard whose brainy gal pal turns out to be a pussy hair's breadth shy of a full blown sex addict behind closed doors. Baby faced newcummer Jewel Styles plays Horny Whoremoine, ever inventing new perils for her beau to conquer in the quest for harder kink.

"Bree's Big Screw Review" is set to release through Adam & Eve in 2009, but you can sneak a peek with us right now by checking out these behind the scenes photos we snapped just for you. Keep your fingers crossed for another episode!

O2: The Surrender of O

"We hate to be wet alone," says Marie (Nina Hartley) of her new, incorrigible slave O (Bree Olson). "(But) we don't punish because they're bad, we punish because it's fun."

In the rarefied world of O2, director Ernest Greene's "fan fiction" updating of characters from Anne Desclos' "The Story of O" (and the sequel to 2006' O: The Power of Submission), everything requires permission and everything has rules. But the consequences are supposed to be fun.

So what happens in a D/s relationship when things aren't fun anymore?

Before we get to that, let's talk about Bree Olson and Carmen Luvana.

In the original, former Adam & Eve flagship contract star Carmen Luvana played the title character as Carmen Luvana herself is; a steely, no-nonsense sweaterminx who was all machine-crafted porn-star curves. Olson inhabits the role in a far-more cushiony way. It is easy to believe the sub in her. In fact, as the stern (but fair) Hartley and the Amazonian Sheridan put O(lson) through her paces, hanging her upside down, smacking tantalizingly close to her most secret places, O looks like a delicious and yielding piece of dough beside the two more angular ladies.

"You don't have to see the first one to get the story," director Greene says. But I get the feeling Adam & Eve would like you to. The first movie made a lot of money and still brings in a fair amount of cash each month, which is unheard of for a porn movie from two years ago (which is a much better way of saying "a two-year-old porn movie").

The sequel finds our heroine still in love with the man she left behind, having even lasered off his tattoo from her tramp stamp area. But can she keep away? And will Marie be her enabler?

O is a sexual tourist, a servant of many masters, and the story of O is what constitutes fidelity in the master/slave relationship.

Marie and Mistress Nicole (Nicole Sheridan) are co-dominatrices in a clean industrial space to which O has hied herself to begin masturbating without permission. And this is not allowed.

So the movie opens with this zesty little scene in which Olson is nothing but a willing plaything to Marie and Mistress Nicole. And this is fine. BDSM purists will love it as will fans of Hartley, Sheridan, and Olson, each of whom represents a body type characteristic of the generations of Porn in which she started.

But after her workout, Olson and Hartley start talking (Sheridan has been dispatched to In-n-Out Burger, where she will return with a bagful of Double Doubles that the ladies will wrestle in for the O sequel in my mind). As in real life, Hartley as Marie plays an impish mentor, suggesting to O that her "maintenance doses" of whupping might not be enough to scratch O's itch.

"Why don't you come up to the house?" says Marie.

The house! If there had been a budget for it, we would have flashed back to 2006 and the strange events at The House, a full-immersion "lifestyle" chateau in which masters, mistresses and their servants live their roles unfettered by aspects of common living like phone bills, nosy relatives, and Jehovah's Witnesses. It was here that O's character was swapped between the imperious Steven and his tragic brother Ray, and where O broke Steven's heart.

The house!

O swallows her fear and makes the drive, and in a quick montage sequence that would have made Stephen J. Cannell rethink his career, she gets herself gussied up for the experience, removing underthings, self-shackling handcuffs, etc.

At the house, O meets Rita (Mika Tan) and Regina (Kayden Kross), who let her know that Marie is the prime mover in the operation, not the fellows whom she lets think are in charge.
"It's a quite profitable business," Regina says. "For us."

But wouldn't that make me a whore? we hear O thinking.

"Don't even say it," Rita says.

Now it's time for more sex. For someone who so clearly looks like the late-model porn star, Kayden Kross sure works hard for her money. Unlike Olson, who looks the part of a welcoming sub, the porn-glamorous Kross must convince us that she really likes what she's doing, and she does this in a post-shaving interlude with Erik Everhard. She and the Canadian Everhard engage in some cross-border trucing that is all about the north/south reconciliation and not about fisheries.

But things are going tough for O. Not only is Steven downstairs making Tan and Ava Rose do terrible, wonderful things, but his prodigal half-brother Ray (Tommy Gunn) also just checked in. O is distraught, and Rita dutifully runs to tell Marie, after Rita and O share a tearful girls' moment in the tastefully appointed swingers' lavatory. It's a goddamn henhouse with buttplugs in there.

"Oh, poor O," says Marie when Rita tells her the news, as if Marie couldn't have prevented all this potential heartache. (Like God, a dominatrix always wants to take the credit for the good times, but when things go south, it's all about your personal responsibility.)

Anyway, after watching O endure encounters with both cold Steven and hapless Ray (the brothers have a scene together - in which they talk - where I almost forgot I was watching a porn movie, save for Kayden Kross' ass), puppetmistress Marie orchestrates a reconciliation between O and Steven. She even gives the soon-to-be-couple a ring with the inscription "Freedom is deciding whose slave you want to be."

At this point I was wondering "what gives you the right, Marie?" when O said those very words on screen.

"I don't," says Marie. "But, like everything I have in life, I took it."

So not only does O2 illuminate and glorify good D/s relationships as healthy partnerships between thoughtful people, it also validates Marie's unsettling compulsion to meddle. This domme is topping from the side.

All in all, that's a lot to think about while lubricating your apparatus.

While now and then a performer seems to struggle with the lines he has been asked to deliver, my only real problem with this movie is that it looks like it deserved more money. Normally with porn movies it's the other way around; they are playing at "mainstream" production values but lacking the skill to pull it off. O2 had the skills but, with only five days to shoot what could have been a month-long indie project, it was like having to watch Lawrence of Arabia on a little black and white TV.

Regardless, as a sex film, as a lifestyle documentary, and as a flesh-packed, English-language telenovela, O2: The Surrender of O is, like its predecessor, another porn movie that transcends its genre. Remember: Come for the Nina, stay for the Bree.

Studio: Adam & Eve
Director: Ernest Greene
Cast: Bree Olson, Kayden Kross, Tommy Gunn, Evan Stone, Nina Hartley, Ava Rose, Trinity Post, Mika Tan, Bobbi Starr, Erik Everhard, Jerry, Claire Adams, Marco Banderas, Nicole Sheridan

Review by: Gram Ponante

· Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
· Buy "O2: The Surrender of O" (tlavideo.com)

So hat better time for Adam & Eve Pictures to present us with Andre Madness’s newest release, "Bree and Sasha," which deftly blends the sheer orgasmic poetry of AVN’s Best New Starlet Bree Olson with the sexual complexity and existential angst of AVN’s Performer of the Year Sasha Grey? The girls plow through piles of deliciously velvety pink goodness, swimming the proverbial Sapphic backstroke in the juices of knockout beauties such as Lexxi Tyler, Lisa Neils, Angie Savage, Samantha Ryan, Sophia Santi and the insatiable (former) contract star Ava Rose. The end result is some of the best girl on girl action we’ve seen in a while, which, uh, caused us hours of delay in prepping this post.

Like peanut butter and chocolate, Bree and Sasha are two great tastes that taste great together. "Bree and Sasha" is available this week.

· Adam and Eve (adameve.com)

What you must needs do to win this week's contest in as spectacular a fashion as last time's winner slyty did is to tell us what you would say to ripe Bree Olson to lure her into your experienced Sapphic boudoir. Not that she looks like she needs much convincing.

· Girlfriends Films (girlfriendsfilms.com)
· Buy "Lesbian Seductions 15: Older/Younger" (gamelink.com)

. . .

Costumes:
Even though she's pictured in the trademark fedora on the cover, Ava Rose's Jones generally opts for the topless look, eschewing the Indy's customary leather and khakis for a more breezy, summertime feel. You never know when a quick costume change might help you slip into a particularly well-guarded tomb.
Advantage: Carolina

Tools:
Indy uses his trusty whip for just about everything, while Carolina, oddly enough, opts for a boomerang with which she pummels aggressive suitors.
Advantage: Indy (But only because you can't swing over a pit of snakes with a boomerang.)

Sidekick:
In "Temple of Doom," Indy adopted Short Round, a small, wisecracking Chinese boy with a funny voice and a wisdom beyond his years. In "Broken Covenant," Carolina adopts Dixie (played by the adventurous Bree Olson), a buxom, wisecracking Southern girl with a funny voice and a wisdom beyond her years. (Sample advice to her companion. "You've got a pussy, dont'cha? Use it or lose it!") Short Round distracts guards by running between their legs. Dixie just fucks them.
Advantage: Carolina (Duh.)

Villains:
Never trust shady European treasure hunters with white hair! Indy is haunted at every turn by dirty Frenchman René Belloq, then turncoat Walter Donovan, then Soviet minx Irina Spalko who wants to mind rape everyone in America. Meanwhile, Carolina is seized by a crazy old coot who nearly kills her and her friends in his backyard. However, none compare to Arnold Toht, the evil Gestapo agent who is both creepy and psychotic, burning the key to the Well of the Souls right into the palm of his hand without missing a beat. Fortunately, each one of these people eventually get their faces melted off.
Advantage: Indy

Evil Henchmen:
Bad guys in all the movies employ an army of faceless olive drab clones who are either German, Russian, Nazi, or all of the above. Carolina's pursuers can also be spotted driving leftover Soviet trucks, so all your evil empire bases are covered.
Advantage: Draw

Femme Fatales:
Nikky Blond (as Helga) bears a striking resembles to "The Last Crusade"'s Alison Doody, though she dies much earlier. But what a death it is, coming shortly after a boning session down in the catacombs.
Advantage: Carolina

Accents:
We're not sure which was more forced—Bree Olson's high-pitched southern drawl or Cate Blanchett's fussy Russian dominatrix. But Bree is just so adorable, we can't possibly knock her down.
Advantage: Carolina

Gruesome Fates:
Besides the spiked dildo to the head above, the most striking parallel between the two films is that both "Crystal Skull" and "Broken Covenant" feature a scene where the bad guy meets a horrible end at the tiny claws and teeth of ravenous, man-eating fire ants. Not a good way to go. Having honey poured on your cock before they devour it is just adding insult to injury.
Advantage: Carolina

Treasure:
Carolina is also on the hunt for the Ark of the Covenant; the very same artifact that made her dad famous. (Yes, you read that right .... Carolina is Indy's daughter! And much better behaved than her greaser brother, if you ask us.) Papa comes to the rescue to save the Ark and his brood, which is a little disappointing, because we think Carolina could have handled herself just fine. Just like the last time, foolish people pay for messing with the Ark and the Jones family, although the aforementioned face-melting still makes us cringe to this day. Advantage: Indy

Sex:
Indy is a legendary cocksman, bagging lady friends from Nepal to Vienna to Shanghai. Carolina, however, does not follow in his footsteps. In fact, she's only had sex with one man in her whole life! He was a suave treasure hunter who broke her heart and left her unable to love. (That's why his penis gets eaten by ants.) The tables are turned however, when "Crystal Skull" finds Indy settling down with his baby mama while Carolina finally buries her man troubles (literally!) and makes up for her lack of sexual experience in a big way.
Advantage: Like you have to ask?

And the winner is ... Only one movie this summer will give you action, adventure, treasure, and a sizzling hot anal threesome. We think the choice is clear.

· Adam & Eve's "Carolina Jones And The Broken Covenant" (official film site @ carolinajonesxxx.com)
· Order: "Carolina Jones And The Broken Covenant" (Adult DVD Empire)

* * * * *

Previously: Ava Rose In "Carolina Jones And The Broken Covenant" (Yes, That Was Quick)

From what we hear (= no, we haven't received our screener copies yet—funny you should ask!) it's more of a good-natured spoof than an earnest attempt to emulate the original ... and for that we are grateful. After all, things like exotic locations, frenetic action sequences, and heavy dialogue are all very good in their place, but when it comes to Ava Rose and Bree Olson (along with Nikky Blond and Roxy Panther), wouldn't you rather watch them doing what they do best—mainly, everyone in sight?

· Adam & Eve's "Carolina Jones And The Broken Covenant" (official film site @ carolinajonesxxx.com)
· Order: "Carolina Jones And The Broken Covenant" (Adult DVD Empire)

An O, you say. One O, coming right up.

· Hustler (hustlerworld.com)
· Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
· Bree Olson (breeolson.com)
· Buy "Anally Yours ... Bree Olsen" (gamelink.com)