By Dashiell Bennett, 11:59 PM on Fri Jun 29 2007, 10,121 views (Edit, to draft, Top, Slurp)

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· Be honest ... does this new layout make our ass look big?
· Our West Coast Bureau Chief took a much needed vacation all the way over in Los Angeles. It really is like another planet.
· Oh, and there were awards, too! We hope IKEA doesn't run out of shelves.
· Britney Spears can dress herself, thank you very much. She just chooses not to.
· Teenagers, you say? On teh internets? Who are the ad wizards who came up with that one?
· The Mangina ... don't leave home without it.
· You guys are getting better at this porn titles thing. Don't quit your day jobs, though.
· Remember, it's not the size of the axe, it's how you swing it. Unfortunately, from now on we'll be bludgeoning you with a heavy club. See ya, Monday!