Fleshbot: stormy daniels

Porn's Hot 100: Genesis Picks The Hundred Hottest Pornstars

Lux Alptraum — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 13:00:00 EDT

There are countless women making a living in Porn Valley—and while many can succeed as porn performers, only a handful will ever be crowned stars. And a mere fraction of those stars will be in the top 100.

Yes, Genesis has released their annual list of the best of the best: and whether you love it or hate it, it's interesting to see who they deem worthy of the top 100 title. We've taken a closer look at their pick for the top ten, with a look at where these ladies were listed last year—and our thoughts on their current position.

As always, your thoughts for who should have made the cut are welcome in the comments.

2009 Porn's Hot 100 (genesisonline.com)

Previously: The 100 Hottest Women In Porn (According To Genesis, Anyway) (fleshbot.com)

10. Gianna Michaels

Last Year's Rank: 21

Fleshbot's Thoughts: If anything, we're just shocked it's taken so long to get the wondrous Gianna into the top ten. She's a strong performer with a resume that's as expansive as her T&A. Heck, she made our top ten all the way back in 2007.

· Photo via Reality Kings (realitykings.com)

9. Joanna Angel

Last Year's Rank: 18

Fleshbot's Thoughts: Again, it's good to see a long time favorite (and, ahem, Supreme Commandress) recognized in the top ten. We'd love to know what boosted her rank this year—was it "LA Pink"? Cause "LA Pink" does look pretty awesome....

· Photo via Burning Angel (burningangel.com)

8. Belladonna

Last Year's Rank: 5

Fleshbot's Thoughts: Any top ten that doesn't include Belladonna is just kidding itself.

7. Briana Banks

Last Year's Rank: 22

Fleshbot's Thoughts: Another hardworking performer who should have been in the top ten ages ago.

· Photo via Earl Miller (earlmiller.com)

6. Bree Olson

Last Year's Rank: 10

Fleshbot's Thoughts: Bree got a slight boost in the rankings this year—and with releases like "The Five", it's not hard to see why.

· Photo via Twistys (twistys.com)

5. Stormy Daniels

Last Year's Rank: 1

Fleshbot's Thoughts: Stormy's stayed strong this year—but she's also shifted her focus from making porn to pursuing a career in politics. You can't stay on top if you're not fully in the game.

· Photo via Wicked Pictures (freewicked.com)

4. Tera Patrick

Last Year's Rank: 2

Fleshbot's Thoughts: We're a bit surprised to see that Tera's still in the top ten. Not that we don't find her enthralling—but she barely performs anymore. Shouldn't that be a knock against her?

3. Jesse Jane

Last Year's Rank: 3

Fleshbot's Thoughts: Digital Playground's resident superstar holds steady. No surprises here: with her talent and enthusiasm for her work, Jesse's not going anywhere for a while.

· Photo of Jesse Jane courtesy of Digital Playground (digitalplayground.com)

2. Jenna Haze

Last Year's Rank: 4

Fleshbot's Thoughts: There's a very good reason why Jenna bagged Female Performer of the Year—and it's the same reason why she scored the number two slot on the Genesis list: this girl is fucking hot.

· Photo via Big Wet Asses (freepornofreeporn.com)

1. Sasha Grey

Last Year's Rank: 6

Fleshbot's Thoughts: 2009 is the Year of Sasha Grey. If she hadn't been crowned with the number one slot, we might have had to organize a protest (Million Fleshbot Reader March, anyone?).

· Photo via Twistys (twistys.com)

Stormy Daniels, "Reinvented"

DCypher — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 15:00:00 EDT

Anything that features both the luscious beauty Stormy Daniels and the stunning Alektra Blue really doesn't need much of an introduction. Which is a shame, because their latest movie "Reinvented" is both clever and well made.

Much of the story line, which features Stormy playing the pretty, dedicated, hard-working fiancee of Randy Spears, running his adult website, then getting dumped for Alektra, a hot young model, will prolly be lost on the viewer. That's because the storyline is so seamless that it doesn't stretch our suspension of disbelief at all. It's also because a great number of viewers will simply be incapable of focusing on the story line once they see these two incredible beauties getting naked and fucking.

We know that last sentence is more than James Lipton can bear, or the director herself (sweet succulent Stormy) wants to hear—but can't deny. Sorry, angel face, but you're irresistibly hot. Deal with it.

Jenaveve Jolie and Trina Michaels also join the cast, turning in fantastic performances that will leave you drooling. God, it's good to see Jenaveve again. Marcus London is the lucky stiff who gets to nail this exquisitely exotic beauty. We're plenty jealous, Marcus, but ultimately grateful that you gave her the kind of stuffing we believe her sexy pink gash deserves.

"Reinvented" releases this week from Wicked Pictures. Check out our exclusive gallery below.

Stormy Daniels Is Feeling "Tormented" Lately

DCypher — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 15:00:00 EDT

And with so much on her plate it's easy to see why...our blonde darling crossover star needs more hot kinky sex in her life! That's all!

It appears that legendary, award-winning director Jonathan Morgan is still alive and well and working over at Wicked Pictures (just as he has been for over a decade now). Despite his alarmingly reclusive nature in the last few years (which has earned him his latest nickname: the JD Salinger of porn), the quality of the work he produces has not been diminished. If anything, we'd say it has gone up. Now, instead of bells and whistles and rickety rackety, he's all substance and style—and we're very impressed!

With today's release of' "Tormented," we see a true master hard at work on his craft. Coupled with Stormy Daniels, the duet delves deep into the sinister side of seduction for an admittedly darker take on Wicked's generally insouciant and effervescing starlet.

"I have a really dark and perverted streak in me that no one knows about," Stormy would have said, undoubtedly, if her publicist could speak through her mouth to promote this movie. "I like to explore my fantasies of domination, submission and other sexually altered states, allowing reality to take a back seat to the perverted passions deep within my mind."

Okay, so maybe she didn't exactly say any of those things. Nor, for the record, did any of her lovely co-stars, Asa Akira, Priya Rai, Aiden Starr, Shawna Lenee, Sarah Vandella, and Tori Black. But that doesn't mean they don't really feel like that. You don't know. Mere process of deduction implies that there must be some dark fantasies lurking beneath their breathtaking exteriors that drive them to commit such intensely passionate acts and display the raw sexual hunger that they do. That's elementary.

"Tormented" comes out today from Wicked Pictures. Check out our cool gallery. Welcome back, Jonathan—and thank you!

Stormy Daniels and Sascha
Buy "Tormented" (gamelink.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Asa Akira and Tommy Gunn
Buy "Tormented" (gamelink.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Priya Rai, John West, and Marco Duato
Buy "Tormented" (gamelink.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Sarah Vandella, Shawna Lenee, and Anthony Rosano
Buy "Tormented" (gamelink.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Stormy Daniels, Aiden Starr, and Mick Blue
Buy "Tormented" (gamelink.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Stormy Daniels and Sascha
Buy "Tormented" (gamelink.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Tori Black and Marco Duato
Buy "Tormented" (gamelink.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Buy%20"Tormented" (gamelink.com)
Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
nted115_01.jpg" width="1000" height="1490" />Tori Black and Marco Duato

Stormy Daniels' Wild Weekend

Gram Ponante — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 13:30:01 EDT

Over the course of a long weekend, Stormy Daniels' chances to be taken seriously as a U.S. Senator from Louisiana got a whole lot better. And sex with a citizen of a former occupying country was the least of it.

Daniels was arrested in Tampa on Saturday afternoon for domestic abuse. Her husband and publicist declined to comment. This is an age-old political trick: leave them wanting more.

She posted $1,000 bail the next day and headed to California, where on Monday she had sex with British citizen Tony DeSergio on the set of "Sex, Lies, And Spies."

This followed the alleged car bomb that totaled the ride of her political advisor, Brian Welsh, in New Orleans the Thursday before.

Are these events related? Possibly. But before counting Daniels out as the next Junior Senator from the Bayou State, remember that everyone from Edward Kennedy to David Duke to Arnold Schwarzenegger got elected in the face of bigger scandals. And they all have worse breasts. And considering the history of elected office in Louisiana, I think this weekend might just put her ahead.

· Stormy Daniels Arrested for Domestic Violence (xbiz.com)
· Intrigue: Stormy's political advisor hit with car bomb (gramponante.com)

"Operation Tropical Stormy" Declassified

DCypher — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 17:30:01 EDT

Whether or not Wicked Pictures darling Stormy Daniels will make a Senate run is still relatively unclear. One thing that's for sure though is that the buxom blonde will be making waves either way this summer.

That's because in less than a week Wicked Pictures will be declassifying all of their files on "Operation Tropical Stormy"—which is their high tech way of saying they're releasing the movie. Shot in such exotic locations as Hawaii and Chatsworth, OTS is the fiscally irresponsible sequel to Stormy's blockbuster porn epic—"Operation Desert Stormy."

Once again, secret agents Rachel and George (Stormy Daniels and Evan Stone) are paired up. Having just saved the world and been promoted, they reward themselves with a relaxing cruise that leaves them stranded on a jaguar and sex-crazed cannibal infested jungle hellhole. Oh, and it's also the secret lair of North Korean playboy dictator Kim Jong-Il. Despite the incredible duress they are perpetually under (with the threat of imminent death comically lurking behind every single moment on the island), the two manage to squeeze in just about as much ball-draining, snatch-quenching fuck action as a couple of horny honeymooners at a swingers convention in Jamaica.

Joining Miss Daniels and Mister Stone are a burgeoning cast of morally uninhibited young strumpets including Anabelle Lee, Nikki Rhodes, Devon Lee, Gianna Lynn, Mikayla Mendez, Mya Luanna, Shyla Stylez, Sammy Rhodes, Carolyn Reese, Havana Ginger, Renae Cruz, Desiree Diam, Mia Lelani, and Bella Ling. A cast of that size seems like reason enough to give this monster a look.

Whether or not this sequel will pack the punch of its predecessor, which garnered such lofty awards as AVN's 2008 "Best Comedy", XRCO's 2008 "Best Director", Nightmove's "First Choice," and 2008 Empire Award's "Best Overall DVD", "Best Feature", "Editor's Choice Best Video" and "Viewer's Choice Best Video", we cannot say. For now, we're just too busy pouring over the embarrassment of riches they included in promotional materials and waiting for our Operation Tropical Stormy Coconut Rum Flavored Lube to arrive—which should be here any minute now.

"Operation Tropical Stormy" floods onto streets at high tide next week. Check out our exclusive sneak peek now. And to Stormy Daniels we say—good luck with both this amazing looking movie and your Senate bid!

Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
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Spike Offers Seven Pornstars You Can Take Home To Mom

Lux Alptraum — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 17:30:01 EDT

Were we to bring a pornstar home to Mom, we'd probably say, "Hey Mom, meet this awesome pornstar!" Then again, our mother is very liberal (look what her daughter does for a living!).

If your mother is not quite so liberal, however, you might find some use in Spike's list of 7 pornstars capable of passing muster at your family dinner table. If you could actually manage to convince them to come home with you, that is (we have a feeling Stoya might be otherwise occupied).

· The Top Seven Porn Stars You Can Take Home to Mom (spike.com)
· Image of Stoya courtesy of Digital Playground (digitalplayground.com)

Welcome To The "House Of Wicked"

Gram Ponante — Fri, 29 May 2009 11:30:01 EDT

In the summer popcorn blockbuster "House of Wicked" (this reviewer found it way more satisfying than "Terminator," "Wolverine," and "Star Trek"), each of the Wicked contract women (I feel they would be offended to be called girls) gets her own vignette and a couple of guys.

House of Wicked

Studio: Wicked
Director: Brad Armstrong
Cast: jessica drake, Stormy Daniels, Alektra Blue, Mikayla Mendez, Kirsten Price, Kaylani Lei, Johnny Castle, Tommy Gunn, Barrett Blade, Marcus London, Danny Mountain, Derrick Pierce, Rocco Reed, Kris Slater, Alan Stafford, Deep Threat, Brad Armstrong

Review by: Gram Ponante

What's more, each of the vignettes features the performer in what we are led to assume is her own element - therefore no naughty nurses, babysitters, cheerleaders, or - God forbid - pirates. Instead director Brad Armstrong puts Wicked's moneymakers in a much more European setting befitting the company's porn chicks with gravitas image (except for Stormy; the darkest Wiucked performer of them all here plays a cowgirl. Go figure).

"House of Wicked" is known in porn parlance as a high-end gonzo, or wall-to-wall. That means the movie is all sex with limited setup and no dialogue. But that doesn't mean we don't get to know the stars' personalities.

Kirsten Price, for example, is a saucy student. She takes on a couple of dudes in what appears to be the classroom of her Rhodes fellowship. Then jessica drake has a foursome in a fetish den, Kaylani Lei plays to type (she takes one for the team here) as a tough Asian with a taste for motorcyclists, Alektra Blue plays a skatepunk girl, and then Mikayla Mendez shows up as a club vixen.

In each of these scenes there is no angle from which each precious Wicked performer looks less than stunning. In fact, the whole movie seems branded with Wicked iconography. Furthermore, if anyone is made to look a little like a prop in this movie it is the guys, who outnumber their female counterparts by almost two to one, and whose costumes look less believable (Tommy Gunn and Barrett Blade as sk8r dudes with sideways hats, etc., seems a little Chippendales to me).

Which makes me think that "House of Wicked" is a fantastic couples' movie. Each of the women is far more mature and glamorous than bubbleheaded and accessible, each appears to have the reins tightly in hand of who gets to take a poke at her, and that it is the girls who have the pick of the eye candy should make female fans reluctantly agree that there is twice as much for them to gawk at than their boyfriends.

The final scene features every woman (but Stormy, who was probably campaigning) in a civilized and elegant Sapphic hoedown, proving that, at the end of the day, they just wanted to be together.

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
· Buy "House of Wicked" (gamelink.com)

Popshots Of The Week! Stormy Goes Down The Rabbit Hole

Gram Ponante — Fri, 01 May 2009 11:30:01 EDT

Stormy Daniels is wrapping up her on-camera porn career, which is tragic. We cheered up by visiting the set of the "Alice in Wonderland"-flavored "Tormented" to watch her and Aiden Starr fuck like rabbits.

Daniels, who is making a stangely not altogether quixotic run for the U.S. Senate, could have used her porn superstar status to call the movie "Stormented" but she is humble, so she did not.

She and Starr donned getups reminiscent of Tom Petty videos and Mad Hatter's (played by Austrian Mick Blue) Tea Parties for this segment, which serves as a fever dream Stormy's character has while in the Crazy Hospital.

Daniels is herself petite, but Starr looked microscopic by comparison.

"You look like a trial size," Stormy said.

The Wicked Pictures set in North Hollywood was festooned with storybook props, all of which were solid and unyielding. Hard to fuck on, in other words.

But the woman who might some day be known in Senate parlance as The Lady from Louisiana took it in stride. "I'm pretty tough," she said.

Yes, you are. We have a feeling you'll go a lot farther in politics than Mary Carey did.

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Stormy Daniels Explores “The Lifestyle,” Makes Movie

DCypher — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 15:00:00 EDT

When you're a smoking hot contract star like Stormy Daniels, sex isn't just a hobby or a job—it's a lifestyle! Yeah, she's talking about swinging. What else would she be talking about? Politics? Right...

Oh, wait, that's right—she actually might be. But she's not! Which is good, because when she veers into conversations with more depth and political commentary, we tend to get a little lost. Better to leave that to our dear friends over at Wonkette and Daily Kos. For now, we're more than content to treat this stunning blonde sex goddess like the glorious sex object that she is.

Her latest effort, "The Lifestyle," centers around a story porn plot (after all, this is Wicked) featuring a couple desperate to save their fizzled marriage, trying all kinds of inventive ways to return the spark to their sex life. When everything else fails, they finally turn to their friends who can't stop dry humping each other's legs in public. What's the secret to their happy marriage? Wait for it... SWINGING!

Does it all work out? Who cares? Seriously—each scene has at least two girls in it having the time of their young life getting drilled open, all hot and juicy. We gave up on most of the plot lines in these movies a while ago anyway, and we'd venture a guess that we aren't alone in that decision.

Swing masters Voodoo and Nicole Sheridan join in along with Kaylani Lei, Adrianna Nicole, Roxy DeVille, Mackenzee Pierce, Carolyn Reese, Tori Black, and smoldering hot retired redhead Jayme Langford.

Check out our free sneak peek gallery. "The Lifestyle" comes out this week from Wicked Pictures.

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Fleshbot Birthday BabesTM: Stormy Daniels

pweasels — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 12:30:01 EDT

Stormy Daniels has been in the news lately because of a possible Louisiana Senate bid, but maybe it's time to simplify things a little and just say happy birthday to one of our favorite stars.

It is a complex world, particularly now with all kinds of craziness rearing its head in the stock market, in politics, in real estate, and we'd like to take a moment to wish Stormy a happy, sane and enjoyable 30th birthday.

Take a load off, Stormy – just kick off your shoes, have a piece of cake – whatever your favorite kind is – and relax for a little bit. Take a listening tour of Louisiana tomorrow; it'll still be there.

Oh, and Happy St. Patrick's Day, as well. Have some green beer with that cake.

Bio data courtesy of the Internet Adult Film Database

· Internet Adult Film Database (www.iafd.com)
· Stormy Daniels at IAFD.com (iafd.com)
· Buy Stormy Daniels's movies (gamelink.com)

We'd Be Willing To Pay A “Price” For One Night With Stormy

DCypher — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 13:00:00 EDT

If you ask us, there are worse ways to learn about love than having Stormy Daniels move in next door and demand to swing with us—but then again, we've got decidedly alternative values.

What can we say? We're all about the wife swap, the threesome, and the down and dirty taboo busting around here. Especially when the spiciness starts out with Lindsey Meadows getting eaten raw like sushi by Stormy.

So when Wicked contract super star Stormy's newest story porn masterpiece, "The Price of Lust," hit our radar, it piqued our interest—even though it only featured two other girls, Amber Rayne and Lindsey Meadows. At least they were two amazing girls that we love watching get crazy on cock.

The plot plays out like your typical morality play—high school sweethearts experimenting with the neighbors, big city transplants trying to ~~deny~~ escape their kinky side by absconding to suburbia and, not entirely unlike the acclaimed philosopher of yore Thoreau, in the process uncovering the simple metaphysical truth that one cannot hide from your true nature. No matter how far you travel, the giant travels with you; though in this case, "giant" is replaced with "ravenous appetite for strange cock" and "Thoreau" with "Stormy and friends." Shockingly, friends betray each other as temptations eviscerate restraint, and the best kind of super hot sweaty guilty sex goes down. Oh, but at what price, you ask? Right. Yawn.

Honestly, we just don't understand why it always has to end in tears. Why are we still reinforcing these ridiculously outdated social mores? In our humble estimation, this is all just another case of live and learn meets all's well that ends well.

Check the gallery, which features the best pix of lithe beauty Lindsey Meadows getting straight drilled out in her hot tiny snatch like the insatiable spunk junkie she is. It's good to see her getting wild again, cause we were starting to miss her.

"The Price of Lust" releases this week from Wicked Pictures.

· "The Price of Lust" (wickedpictures.com)

Just Don't Call Stormy Daniels A “Whack Job”

DCypher — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 17:00:00 EST

She may be resonating with only 1% of Louisiana voters in her race against sex worker-loving Republican incumbent David Vitter, but Stormy long ago captured our hearts. That's why we've given her our Friday slot.

Yes, suddenly everything is about Stormy Daniels—and it's only going to keep coming. From TPM to Politico, across Fire Dog Lake and through Daily Kos, slipping into the Drudge before wiping off and cleaning up with HuffPo, everyone is talking about her. She's literally all over the blogosphere—which is fine by us. Ubiquity becomes her, in our estimation. And for every repressed Puritan who attacks her, a plethora of fans rise up to defend the busty starlet, testifying to her genial and alluring nature, both in front of and behind the camera. Still, since her media headlines coincide with the impending release of her latest plot-driven movie, "Whack Job," we'd like to make sure that no one gets the two confused in any way.

Displaying her usual touch for poetically blending comedic timing with lusty fantasies, the award winning writer/director tells the story of a spoiled mafia princess who has just discovered her boyfriend in bed with another woman, or, in layman's terms, Roxy DeVille catching lovely Kaylani Lei fucking her man. What's the daughter of a mobster to do? Walk away with a broken heart? Fuggadaboutit! She's nobody's goumada! Roxy puts out not one, but two, hits on the testa di merda and calls it a day. Hilarity ensues. We won't spoil it for you, but you can check out the sneak peek gallery and try to guess the ending. We promise it will be far less predictable then Stormy's senate bid.

"Whack Job" comes out next week from Wicked Pictures.

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)

Before They Were Politicians...

Lux Alptraum — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 17:00:00 EST

Hustler has dug up a scene of potential senatorial candidate Stormy Daniels sensually frolicking with former gubernatorial candidate Mary Carey. Coincidence? We think not. (hustlerworld.com)

Stormy Daniels: (Possibly) Drafted!

Lux Alptraum — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 15:00:00 EST

A few weeks ago, we reported that Stormy Daniels had turned down the opportunity to run against Louisiana Senator David Vitter. Well, apparently we were wrong—we're now hearing she's actually considering a run.

As the Daily Beast has it, Stormy's gaze was turned towards political pursuits when she discovered "Draft Stormy," a web-based campaign to convince Stormy to attempt to unseat Vitter in the Republican primary. Now, we're all for seeing hypocritical politicians ousted out of office—particularly ones who trump their conservative, anti-sex credentials while secretly visiting prostitutes in their spare time—but there's just something a little off-putting about the whole "Draft Stormy" campaign.

We'll cut to the chase: we're bothered by the fact Stormy Daniels isn't being "drafted" because she's Stormy Daniels, the awesome and amazing individual—she's being drafted, first and foremost, because she's a pornstar from Louisiana. Long before "Draft Stormy" ever existed, an ad appeared on Craigslist seeking "a female in some aspect of the adult-entertainment industry" to run against Vitter. Stormy only became the chief candidate that she was a Louisiana-based pornstar who just might work as a candidate.

And why a female from the adult industry? Because the people behind the campaign want to make the point that:

...an honest, intelligent adult film actress has more integrity than a married Republican politician who dallied with prostitutes on the down-low.

Which, frankly, we think sounds a bit condescending to the adult industry—and, for that matter, to Stormy. (We're also curious to know why the campaign specifically wanted an adult film actress—does "Draft Evan Stone" just not have the same ring?)

But hey, maybe we're just being negative nellies here: after all, if Stormy does run, there's a huge opportunity for progress right there. Italy elected its first pornstar politician in 1987—maybe 2009 will be the year America follows in its footsteps?

We'll be keeping our fingers crossed for that one.

· Draft Stormy (draftstormy.com)
· Porn Star for Senate (thedailybeast.com)
· Stormy Daniels: Politics, P. Diddy, and the Porn Retirement Plan (avn.com)

Stormy Daniels For President Public Office!

Lux Alptraum — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 16:30:01 EST

We won't claim to understand all the ins and outs of Louisiana politics, or why it makes sense to have an adult film star run against an incumbent senator mired in a sex scandal.

But we will claim to know that Stormy Daniels is an intelligent, accomplished woman with a good head on her shoulders (and a talent for public speaking). So we're sad to hear that she will not be running for Louisiana senator—we're sure she would have made a hell of a candidate. Maybe next election?

· Sinator Vitter (bestofneworleans.com, via pornstarbabylon.wordpress.com)
· Thumbnail from Penthouse (penthouse.com, via Ask Jolene

Stormy Daniels Offer Tips On Talking To Pornstars

Lux Alptraum — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 17:30:01 EST

Your chances of meeting a pornstar may be pretty slim—but if you do get to meet one, Stormy Daniels has come up with a list of 10 things you should never, ever say.

Most of them should be obvious to anyone with half a brain, but if you're worried that—in all the excitement of meeting your favorite star—you might forget your manners, we encourage you to print out the list and carry it in your wallet. We'd also advise you to add an 11th item: should you run into Sasha Grey, under no circumstances should the words "crossover star" exit your lips.

· 10 Things You Should Never Say to a Porn Star (asylum.com)
· Thumbnail via KellyFind (kellyfind.com)

Postcards From Vegas: And They're Off!

Lux Alptraum — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 13:30:01 EST

AEE 2009 kicked off with Stormy Daniels cutting the ribbon at the door. Or would have, at least, if the scissors had worked. Instead, we got Stormy ripping the ribbon. As long as it's broken, right?

· Adult Entertainment Expo (adultentertainmentexpo.com)

Sick Fascination: "Bubba Raw"

pweasels — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 16:30:10 EST

Softcore rocks, doesn’t it? Watching a girl not show off the kitty can be just as fascinating as seeing the most explicit double anal gangbang ever filmed. There’s something utterly riveting about seeing what happened on some awful white-trash talk-radio show, especially when there are naked girls like Stormy Daniels, Taya Parker and Akira cavorting about the studio.

. . .

Remember catching the Howard Stern show on late-night TV and trying to look around the pixels at the naked girls? There may not be a lot of reasons to watch a softcore porn DVD with a man named Bubba in it, but when Stormy Daniels delivers a mold of her own vagina for a man to penetrate, when Taya shows off her best lapdancing tricks, when Bubba plays a montage of the porn stars who have flashed their tits on his show …well, it’s almost worth it. But is "Almost" enough anymore?

There’s a reason you never saw “Bubba Does Dallas,” though.

· Bubba Raw (www.bubbaraw.com)
· Buy "Bubba Raw #2" (gamelink.com)

Top Ten Female Porn Directors (According To XCritic)

Lux Alptraum — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 16:01:26 EDT

Pornography has traditionally been seen as a man's game but—as we've noted many times before—as more and more women start working behind the scenes, that notion is quickly becoming outdated. Women are making porn (and making porn better), and we're certainly grateful to see that glass ceiling chipping away (if not outright crumbling). And we're not the only ones who feel that way: the team at XCritic is celebrating ladies making porn with a list of their ten favorite female porn directors. After the jump, see who made the list—and some samples of their work, too.

10. Suze Randall: "Too Naughty To Say No"

9. Candida Royalle: "Under The Covers"

8. Mason

7. Jamye Waxman
"Exploring The 'O'"

6. Diana Devoe

5. Kimberly Kane: "Morphine"

4. Stormy Daniels
"Operation Desert Stormy" (gamelink.com)

3. Belladonna
"My Ass Is Haunted"

2. Celeste
"Stoya Video Nasty"

1. Tristan Taormino
"Chemistry 4: The Orgy Edition"

Honorable Mentions (some of whom we think should have been on the list): Joanna Angel, Ashley Blue, Dana Dearmond, Aunt Gertrude

· The Top Ten Women Directors In Porn (xcritic.com)

Wicked's "The Wicked"

Gram Ponante — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 15:00:59 EDT

You wonder why Wicked has waited so many years to release an eponymous title, but you also wonder why Kaylani Lei hasn't been delivered to you personally as part of the bailout package. Read on to discover why vampires seem to be devouring condom-only performers in the California Desert.

The Wicked

A couple fucks in a day-for-night desert as Wicked's vampire movie, The Wicked, opens. After putting on her clothes, she realizes she is alone. "Where are you?" she panics in the emptiness. "This isn't funny anymore!"

Well, who said it was ever funny? She is soon dispatched with, a 28 Days Later-style burst of screams, blood, growls, and an out of control camera. Wicked vampires!

As the opening credits roll past the unfortunate woman, we meet a Volkswagen Bus full of adventurers. Among them is Kaylani Lei, off to the desert for a weekend concert after finding her boyfriend in bed with a hooker (Jenny Hendrix). I don't know why she got so mad - doesn't she know that Jenny Hendrix is Good Times personified and no threat to Real Love?

Then we meet Baby and Otis (Stormy Daniels and Derrick Pierce), shifty types who've suffered a breakdown in the desert. Luckily our heroes happen by to pick them up, though only the driver (Barrett Blade) seems to think it's a good idea. Another passenger is Voodoo, a conspiracy buff cautious about weirdness in the desert. He is not taken seriously. In fact, the drive is so fraught with manufactured tension that we wonder why any of these people are friends.

Everyone is so nice to look at, though, that I guess it doesn't matter if they like each other.

The porn talent pool is so small, and the contract star system so limiting, that chemistry is hard to find, even in a population that has interfucked so often. One thing going for The Wicked is Blade's and Voodoo's chemistry with Lei, Tori Black, Scarlett Fay, and the other females in the cast. And, when they're allowed, Daniels and Pierce find room for "character" work.

Chemistry or no, the gang is edgy after a long drive, and strange things are happening in the middle of nowhere. Worse still, only Daniels' and Pierce's sex scene is filmed in natural light; everything else shows up in cold blue or red. This can only detract from excellent scenes between Voodoo and Fay and Blade and Lei.

In her motel bed, Kaylani dreams of being ravished by vampires in the desert (including Sophia Santi). Then she goes to a strip club with her pals and lets loose. Oddly enough, some of the characters from her dream show up as strippers! You wouldn't expect to find such high quality strippers in such a remote location, either.

There's other odd things going on in Desert City. Regardless, Kaylani and Barrett get over their friction and learn to love each other. Napping in the car, however, Kaylani again dreams of the vampires. Voodoo gets more agitated and, once the crew arrives at the concert, the stage is set for a bloodbath, as the vampires show up en masse for their solstice feast.

But it isn't scary. Shouldn't it be? Maybe the market suggests otherwise.

Since Wicked makes so many gauzily competent movies that seem to avoid actual inspiration, I wonder if sales figures indicate that being too good or too edgy or - in the case of a vampire movie - too scary might hurt business.

The Wicked's twist ending attests to the fact that a movie with great production values and a competent yet derivative script is Wicked's way of suggesting mainstream movies without actually ripping them off, a la Pirates. But what's the matter with an outright porn ripoff if it's good? The Wicked is a good porn movie but the vehicle of its story - the horror! - falls flat. I think it's the condom policy.

Review by: Gram Ponante

Studio: Wicked
Director: Michael Raven
Cast: Kaylani Lei, Stormy Daniels, Mikayla Mendez, Annabelle Lee, Jenny Hendrix, Roxy Deville, Scarlett Fay, Sophia Santi, Tori Black, Aaron Wilcoxxx, Barrett Blade, Barry Scott, Derrick Pierce, Evan Stone, Johnny Castle, Rocco Reed, Voodoo

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
· Buy "The Wicked" (gamelink.com)

Quoth Michael Raven, "The Wicked" Evermore

DCypher — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 15:20:15 EDT

In what he claims is his best work to date, Wicked Pictures director Michael Raven breathes new life into the hoary horror porn genre with "The Wicked", a sexy retelling of a group of hot young Burners (is there any other kind?) who get lost in the desert on the way to Black Rock City and become embroiled in a romantic and terrifying vampire drama. Hey, it could totally happen! (Depending what sort of hallucinogenics you took on the way to Burning Man, that is.)

The plot involves Barrett Blade allowing his little head to do the thinking when he picks up a bombshell hitchhiker in the middle of nowhere; they later shack up in a hotel room together to save funds for partying. (You do know how expensive it is to attend Burning Man, don't you?) Along comes supernaturally endowed Voodoo to explain that they're in danger of being eaten alive by blood sucking desert weirdos if they're not careful ... and according to the trailer, that’s pretty much what happens. It's sort of like what a porn(ier) version of "True Blood" might look like minus its Louisiana setting, but with an added dose of pornstars, playa dust, and LSD!

Kaylani Lei is joined by a stellar cast including fellow Wicked contract stars Mikayla Mendez and Stormy Daniels, along with newcomers Tori Black and Scarlet Faye, former Digital Playground starlet Sofia Santi, tushy princess Roxy DeVille, and Fleshbot Crush Object Jenny Hendrix. (Did we mention that we love this cast?)

If nothing else, "The Wicked" should convince everyone that Raven is the perfect choice to helm the next "Lost Boys" installment. After all, who better than Kaylani Lei to keep Corey Haim in line?

• "The Wicked" Trailer (avnlive.com)
• Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
• Order: "The Wicked" (Adult DVD Empire)

"Teen Brazil 3" Softly Whispers "Some Day Soon"

Gram Ponante — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 19:10:43 EDT

Have you been to Brazil? You really should go. From the favelas on the hill to the gun battles on the street, everyone is ready for a sexy good time. If you book a ticket, bring me along and I will hold Isabella on my lap just in case there's some emergency.

Anyway, the allure of Brazil includes its juicy variety of people who will have sex with you, and it's always easy to shop for bathing suits for them because you can tell what their style is from their tan lines.

"Smiles, everyone: Smiles!"

Like I would be, this man wonders why his date is smiling at you instead. But what can she say? Brazil's is a tourist-friendly economy.

You know, I believe this guy's leg hair is even distracting her.

The joy of Brazil is that, even with two men going soft inside them, its porn performers can still flash a winning smile. Would Stormy Daniels put up with that? Hell no. She'd say, "Get hard now or you're going to lose it."

· Third World Media (thirdworldxxx.com)
· Buy "Teen Brazil 3" (gamelink.com)

Erotica L.A. On 300 Threads Or Less

Gram Ponante — Sun, 08 Jun 2008 00:12:10 EDT

Foot massagers! Motörhead shirts! Wearable bongs! If these don't say "erotic" to you, you probably still need porn stars for stimulation.

All right. Erotica L.A. had those, too, in its three-day consumer fleshly bazaar at the L.A. Convention Center. But for those of us with more refined libidos, there was also a booth selling Egyptian cotton sheets. And if you need to ask how those are erotic, you've never jerked off to Lemmy Kilmister.

But discount travel agencies and car detailing booths weren't all Erotica L.A. had to offer; there were also dozens of porn stars either signing at stripped-down booths (by comparison with the Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas in January) or roaming the aisles.

Those who say the porn business is dying need only have looked at the long lines stretching in front of a vaguely-military Belladonna to be assured that, no, only the DVD and massive booth-renting business is dying - porn is fine.

Capping Saturday's festivities was the third annual F.A.M.E. Awards, hosted by Jesse Jane and Randy Spears. The adorable Bree Olson won Best Rookie. Other people won other things, and we took their pictures, but we admit we didn't watch the ceremony. We were too busy trying to buy sheets.

· Erotica L.A. (erotica-la.com)

The 100 Hottest Women In Porn (According To Genesis, Anyway)

Lux Alptraum — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 12:50:46 EDT

Speaking of important developments this election year, another set of results have come in that are guaranteed to stir debate among a feverish electorate: Genesis magazine has released their tenth annual "Porn's Hot 100" list, and while we're pleased to see that more than a few of our most notable Crush Objects have made their way onto it (though we're not surprised—after all, having good taste in pornstars has long been one of the prime requirements for this job), we can't help but be aware that there are some readers out there who will be miffed that their favorite(s) didn't make the cut.

After the jump, our tribute to the deserving superstars who made it to Genesis' Top Ten ... and a space for you tell us who should be among them, but wasn't.

. . .

10. Bree Olson

9. Gina Lynn

8. Eva Angelina

7. Hillary Scott

6. Sasha Grey

5. Belladonna

4. Jenna Haze

3. Jesse Jane

2. Tera Patrick

1. Stormy Daniels

· 2008 Porn's Hot 100 (genesisonline.com)

So, where did Genesis go wrong? Have your say in the comments below.

Not to pressure you or anything, but today...

Jonnobot — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 17:05:07 EDT

Not to pressure you or anything, but today is the last day to vote for your favorite stars for this year's F.A.M.E. Awards—though if you have as hard a time deciding among that bevy of Fleshbot favorites for Favorite Female Starlet, all the time in the world wouldn't be enough to make up your mind. They're all winners as far as we're concerned, but you knew that already. (thefameawards.com)

Stormy Daniels Does It For The Kids (Or Not)

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 30 May 2008 08:15:50 EDT

Stormy Daniels descended on Washington, D.C. yesterday to speak at the National Press Club on behalf of the Association of Sites Advocating Child Protection; the AVN Crossover Star of the Year, er, crossed over to deliver the message that kids who want porn can just wait until they're old enough for it, the same way they have to wait to vote or drink or get addicted to prescription drugs. (After all, there are plenty of old folks out there willing to buy her product, so she doesn't need to prey on the young and innocent to earn a buck.) Of course, Stormy commands quite a presence (even in a prim business suit buttoned up the neck), so we feel confident that her message was heard. Now what is she going to do about those gas prices?

· "Porn star to kids: Don't watch me" (examiner.com - thanks Patrick)

Erotica L.A. 2008: A Look Ahead

Gram Ponante — Thu, 29 May 2008 11:15:44 EDT

With six months recovery time after AVN's Las Vegas convention, porn fans are once again ready for the in-person charms of Tera Patrick, Sunny Lane, Stormy Daniels, Belladonna, and Joanna Angel among dozens of other porn luminaries at next weekend's Erotica L.A., a three-day fan event—accessible by public transportation!—at the L.A. Convention Center. Culminating in the FAME Awards and the lively Sexopolis afterparty, Erotica L.A. is like the Vegas show with better air and an escape route. (erotica-la.com + sexopolishollywood.com)

Who Should Be Steven Soderbergh's "Girlfriend"?

Dashiell Bennett — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 12:45:34 EDT

Director Steven Soderbergh has announced that his next project will be "The Girlfriend Experience," a ~~cinéma-vérité~~ low-budget indie film about a $10,000-a-night hooker. Since the movie would be shot in the style of his previous film, "Bubble," it will employ a minimal amount of money, sets, professional actors, or even written words—the dialogue will be mostly improvised. This lack of Hollywood touches, plus the subject matter, has led early speculation to be that Soderbergh may hire an experienced adult film actress to play the lead. But who would that be?

We can think of dozens of actresses off the top our head who can convincingly hump like a hooker, but can they handle the off-the-cuff dramatic style and display the emotional range required to make a full human person believable on screen? Amateur casting directors everywhere are ready to weigh in—and frankly we're a little hurt that our siblings at Defamer didn't think to ask us—but who better than our readers to find us the prefect choice? We have a few nominees of our own in the poll below, but feel free to make your own suggestions in the comments. The future of mainstream porn depends on you!

. . .

· Soderbergh to direct 'Girlfriend' (variety.com, via Defamer)

But What They Really Want To Do Is Direct

Jonnobot — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 13:20:00 EDT

Inspired by Jenna Jameson's role in "Zombie Strippers" (which opens this weekend), Premiere magazine takes a long and well-considered look at the history of porn stars in mainstream cinema from Linda Lovelace to Jenna Herself: "Whether any of these performers has a chance to graduate from porn window-dressing to 'real' roles remains (an) open question. As does, to be fair, whether all porn performers actually want mainstream acceptance. There's a big part of the industry that doesn't give it a second thought." (premiere.com)

Stormy, Tera, And Jesse Descend On Miami

Gram Ponante — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 17:14:42 EDT

Jesse Jane, Tera Patrick, and Stormy Daniels will host the three-day fan convention Exxxotica: Miami this weekend, joining everyone from Ron Jeremy (of course) to Jenna Haze, Eva Angelina, Bree Olson, Kayden Kross, Joanna Angel, Nautica Thorn, Moxxie Maddron, Roxy DeVille, the saucy Lisa Sparxxx, Donna Doll, and Taylor Wane to romp at the "erotic event" that could only happen at the Miami Beach Convention Center. Speaking of erotic, "Girls Gone Wild" will be there, too (now that the tax deadline has passed).

Erica Ellyson Is Still Penthouse Pet Of The Year

Dashiell Bennett — Tue, 19 Feb 2008 12:39:16 EST

Although the rest of the internet-enabled world heard the news weeks ago, those folks who still buy their magazines on paper will find Erica Ellyson on their newsstands this morning as the newly (officially) crowned 2008 Penthouse Pet of the Year. How she snagged that crown seems to be a matter of some dispute, at least according to her fellow "contestant" Stormy Daniels. However, we lost our faith in the electoral process about two terms ago, so we're not really going to squabble over minor details like "votes" and "winners." Just check out some previews shots from her POTY pictorial ... and hope the Supreme Court stays out of this one.

· Erica Ellyson - Penthouse Pet of the Year 2008 (penthouse.com)
· See also: "Don't Vote For Stormy Daniels" (gamelink.com)

* * * * *

Previously: Erica Ellyson: 2008 Penthouse Pet Of The Year

"2 Girls 1 Cupcake": Stormy Goes Viral

DCypher — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 12:31:13 EST

Crossover Starlet of the Year (from both big adult awards shows) Stormy Daniels tackles new ground via viral marketing in a new sexy spoof on the infamous "2 Girls 1 Cup" clip that thoroughly scarred anyone unlucky enough to have actually viewed it. In Stormy's version an innocent cupcake is sandwiched between her and Roxy DeVille before being obliterated through a series of sloppy tongue licks and smeared all over their faces and naked boobs. When it comes to girls getting dirty, this is the kind of stuff we can watch over and over again ... and we promise it won't make you gag. (Unless you're not into cupcakes. And who isn't into cupcakes?)

. . .

· "2 Girls 1 Cupcake" (veoh.com)
· Stormy Daniels (stormydaniels.com)
<· a href="http://www.mysoace.com/stormydaniels">Stormy Daniels @ MySpace (myspace.com)

Porn Vegas Dispatch: Jenna Jameson Makes It Absolutely Clear

Gram Ponante — Mon, 14 Jan 2008 14:15:02 EST

While her surgeries and weight loss have altered her appearance, Jenna Jameson is still porn's most recognized name, even if non-porn media on the red carpet at the AVN Awards on Saturday night were overheard gasping "That's Jenna Jameson?"

Jameson has also attracted a great deal of mainstream attention, but mostly in the form of scrutiny of her surgical choices, and she seemed bitter when she told Saturday's AVN Awards crowd that she would "never spread her legs for the porn industry again" in one of the show's many awkward moments. This was followed by Stormy Daniels who, upon winning the Jenna Jameson Crossover Star of the Year award, said she intended to be spreading her legs for the porn industry for years to come. And so it goes.

Previously: 2008 AVN Awards: Dispatches From The Front

La Femme-Dom Nikita Denise: The Return

Gram Ponante — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 19:36:38 EST

That it has been oft-remarked that she sounds like she would be as comfortable yelling "Kill moose and squirrel!" as she would "I will turn your ass inside out", the prodigal pornstress Nikita Denise has returned to performing, and the adult industry is atwitter with the news that the fierce, proud Czech is back with a vengeance after a three-year hiatus.

Denise, who won AVN's 2002 Performer of the Year award, returned to the fold at the behest of Stormy Daniels, who directed her in a scene for Wicked's upcoming "Predator 2". (We don't know how they got away with that title, either; maybe Denise did the negotiating with Governor Schwarzenegger.)

"She really knows how to eat 'Puuss-sy,'" Daniels added.

· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
· Nikita Denise (nikitadenise.com)

Sunday With Stormy

Gram Ponante — Fri, 19 Oct 2007 17:02:34 EDT

The tiny dynamo, or pornomo, that is Stormy Daniels writes and directs most of the movies she stars in, including her latest, "Operation Desert Stormy". This Sunday she will join the Upright Citizens Brigade at their theatre in Hollywood to talk about the movie and to make with the "personal reminiscences" as fodder for their show. We have not yet seen "Operation Desert Stormy" because we've yet to crawl out from under its mountain of related swag, but we hear it's very funny, and the UCB is pretty damn funny as well, so once you're clear of your audit at the Celebrity Centre across the street, go see Stormy.

· Stormy Daniels (clubstormydaniels.com)
· "Operation Desert Stormy" (wickedpictures.com)
· Buy "Operation Desert Stormy" (gamelink.com)
· Upright Citizens Brigade (uprightcitizens.org)

Previously: Porn Valley Dispatch Archive

Popshots of the Week: Ink Spots Edition

Gram Ponante — Thu, 11 Oct 2007 19:55:44 EDT

Tattoos abound this week in the porn world, probably because there is a nip in the air and we often confuse pain with heat. There is no better time to feature several of our inked favorites, including Joanna Angel, who recently finished signing duties to get a flower with a bomb in it burned into her side at New Jersey's Starlight Tattoo Convention. I asked Angel what the difference was between porn conventions and tattoo conventions.

"I was the only porn girl at this one," she said. "I was signing copies of 'Cum on My Tattoo'. There was a huge line. I think that at porn conventions guys just want a pretty girl to smile at them, and any one will do. These people were there to see me."

Stormy Daniels, Jesse Jane, and Carmen Luvana proved that contract girls for different companies can exist in the same place at the same time without Lionel Stander declaring that "it was murder". Here they are at Tampa's Nightmoves show last week.

(Jesse has a tattoo of the Playboy Bunny under her navel.)

The ubiquitous Michelle Aston sprawls on a bench outside Justice Howard's Toys Kill show in Hollywood last week. Aston was featured in the photo exhibition and just about everywhere else. "I'm tired oof teaching 20-year-olds how to fuck," she mused. I reminded her that I was 22.

Finally, Marco Banderas and loveely Newcastle-born wife Lisa DeMarco (get it?) pose in Tampa. We are not sure if either member of the couple has tattoos, but Banderas could probably focus the white hot rays of the sun with his teeth to cook up a workable one of those coccygeal butterflies.

* * * * *

Previously: Popshots Archive

Popshots of the Week!

Gram Ponante — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 18:42:11 EDT

We resolved this week not to let Queen Latifah know that porn directrix Chi Chi LaRue tossed around more "bitches" and "whores" in five minutes than 2 Live Crew did in a career. We learned that Trina Michaels is a favorite of the parking class. And we watched in amazement as Ange Venus, above, channeled Rosasharn Joad.

Join us after the gap for more images of America's porn stars not as the cameras usually see them, but as they really are.

- —

Stormy Daniels, Ron Jeremy, and IS THAT THE GUY FROM COLOR ME BADD??? at the "Operation Desert Stormy" release party.

The affable and volcanic Trina Michaels among the valets.

We stared at leather bar The Faultline's neon display for hours at Chi Chi LaRue's mansex epic "Link: The Evolution" premiere party. It actually shot several globules of manchowder every 30 seconds onto an illuminated "2007". Despite this display of coming on an abstraction falling well within California's sodomy laws, I still found it unsettling.

Chi Chi LaRue called everyone in the audience a bitch or a whore at least twice, and yet they loved him.

* * * * *

Previously: Popshots Archive

AVN launches its spiffy new redesign this...

Fleshbot — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 14:09:51 EDT

AVN launches its spiffy new redesign this week with an update on the release of Stormy Daniel's "Operation Desert Stormy"—which we've been keeping you up to date on as well, but you can never have too many updates where Ms. Daniels is concerned. (We also deserve bonus points for not making any inappropriate weather-related jokes in this post.) (avn.com)

Stormy Daniels Answers Maroon 5's "Wake Up Call"

Fleshbot — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 12:54:14 EDT

If you've ever doubted that porn stars are magic, behold the power of Stormy Daniels: prior to this morning we'd never sat through an entire Maroon 5 video, and now we find ourselves suddenly compelled to watch their new clip for "Wake Up Call" over and over again just to see whether we can spot her amongst all those tied-up babes, pole dancers, and cheesy production effects. (She's apparently the one wearing the ~~Vivid~~ Wicked necklace, in case that helps.) Is there anything that gal can't do?

· "Stormy Daniels Featured in Maroon 5 Music Video" (avn.com)
· Maroon 5: "Wake Up Call" ("director's cut" version @ maroon5.com)
· Club Stormy Daniels (membership preview @ clubstormydaniels.com)

Previously: Stormy Daniels In "The One", Porn Bayou Dispatch: Stormy Pinkness in Baton Rouge, Stormy Descending, Club Stormy

DVD Review: Stormy Daniels in "The One"

Gram Ponante — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 19:54:17 EDT

Tonight begins a long weekend of barbecues, volleyball and, if you're especially lucky, sweaty debauchery in the shallow end of your boss' pool. Wicked Pictures is the largest purveyor of couples' porn to those consumers who like their smut hopeful, soft-edged, and easier than "Dirtpipe Milkshakes" to ask for at their local video store.

Stormy Daniels plays a woman just like you trying to make sense of relationships while burdened with a tiny frame from which jut massive spheroid breasts. Read our review of "The One" after the gap. - GP

- - -

The One

Studio: Wicked
Director: Jonathan Morgan
Cast: Stormy Daniels, Brianna Love, Cassie Young, Delilah Strong, Katie Morgan, Kelly Kline, Nicole Sheridan, Sunny Lane, Eric Masterson, Evan Stone, Mr. Pete, Randy Spears, Voodoo

Review by: - GP

A couple is visited by ghosts of relationships past in order to deal with their current boy/girl woes.

It's tough being Jen (Stormy Daniels), so starved for a relationship that she can't have meaningless sex with a guy without telling him she loves him. And it's tough for Dave (Voodoo), who, when Stormy tells him she loves him, runs out of the room.

Wicked's latest couples' flick, written by Daniels and directed by Jonathan Morgan, aims to deliver the elusive mainstream movie - but with sex - that other studios aspire to. The mood is light and the sex is positive. But can the story sustain it?

Out in the hallway, Dave bumps into ex-girlfriend Roxy (Sunny Lane), who guesses Jen's problem right off the bat.

"How can you love someone who obviously doesn't love herself? She's so insecure, she sticks bags of poisonous water into her chest to get men like you to justify her womanhood."

Daniels' script is festooned with fun lines like this, and sometimes the performers pull them off and sometimes they don't.

"I was just trying to find myself," Roxy says of a previous infidelity.

"In someone else's vagina?" asks Voodoo.

Jen and Dave are visited by several of their exes in the course of the movie, and the flashbacks depict what made them exes in the first place. Randy Spears, Delilah Strong, Nicole Sheridan, and Evan Stone cameo as particularly oily characters.

If the movie has great ambition but doesn't live up to it, is it still better than a movie that doesn't even bother with a story? Hard to tell, but the effort makes The One a winner. After all, there are boatloads of Hollywood movies featuring actors who can't wrap their mouths around their dialogue but who don't compensate by wrapping them around anything else.

My only problem with the movie is that it is lit murkily. Very few scenes take place in the daylight for such a sunny film. These pictures were all taken from the promotional stills rather than screengrabs, which were considerably darker.

The movie ends happily, with both principals realizing that it should be easy to say "I love you" to a porn star.

· Stormy Daniels (clubstormy.com)
· Wicked (wickedpictures.com)
· Buy "The One" (gamelink.com)