"Nurses of Boobsville" Makes Stationary Breasts Seem Uncool Again

By Gram Ponante, 11:30 AM on Thu Jul 16 2009, 12,638 views (Edit, to draft, Slurp)

Copy this whole post to another site

Slurp cancel

select site advertising consumerist deadspin defamer fleshbot gay fleshbot gawker gizmodo idolator io9 jalopnik jezebel kotaku lifehacker valleywag artists gawkershop sploid gawkertv

Riley Evans, as you well know, has perfect breasts. But her four (or eight) counterparts in "Nurses of Boobsville" are so bouncy, sloshy, and boundary-redefining that it is a headscratcher that she even got her Associates Degree in Boobed Nursing.

"We want booby-rockin' - not perfection."

The women in this movie don't so much jiggle as overflow, Carmen Hayes, like a lighter-skinned, larger-jugged Jada Fire, is the most evocative of a time when a young man's thoughts turned to National Geographic as the Gold Standard of Boobs, but even tiny Evie Delatosso does a hypnotic tassel dance without tassels.

Director Jim Malibu knows that boobs and nurses hover at just about cortical level in the minds of porn consumers, and he provides several gloriously gratuitous shots of each of the heroines jumping up and down, driving patients like Eric Swiss out of their minds before gently reeling them in clutched in their voluminous funbags.

Riley Evans is the covergirl and most porny - and anachronistic - of this collection, which also features the wonderfully sloppy Sara Stone and the just-booby-enough Allie Foster.