Bush, Glorious Bush!

By DCypher, 5:00 PM on Tue Jun 23 2009, 23,630 views (Edit, to draft, Slurp)

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The girls in LFP's soon-to-be released "Barely Legal Bush" are so young, so fresh, so ripe, that no one's explained to them the current standards of pubic coiffure. Dive on in and get a mouthful of that blessed beaver.

Porn spoof god Will Ryder helms this tangled tale starring hirsute beauties Laurie Vargas, Britney Ray, Honey Dejour, Carmella Santiago, and Destiny Day. While none of his porn superpowers are brought to bear upon this particular work (particularly the impressive ability to spoof almost anything), it is still quite obvious that the hand of a genius is at play. The girls work themselves up into a frothy lather with wild abandon at his slightest stylish suggestion. The attention to lustrous detail in every shot is evidence of his prime conditioning as a true artist. Then, as the foaming goodness reaches a sweet fever pitch he washes it all off, rinsing away the foaming lust with it's pure sparkling shine and leaving no more tears.

As a matter of fact, we're pretty sure he might have once worked at Johnson & Johnson.

The only thing missing is Ryder himself descending like Rapunzel, "deus ex machina," in the final scene to show the last lad how to properly peel back 70's style beaver bush to eat it without getting a mouth full of short and curlies.

"Barely Legal Bush" comes out next week from LFP but you can witness the power of the beaver right now in our exclusive gallery.