By Dashiell Bennett, 10:20 AM on Wed Jun 4 2008, 1,627 views (Edit, to draft, Slurp)

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We've never really thought of exotic dancing as a competitive sport—there are plenty of poles to go around—but it is, and Carmen Hart is officially your National Champion. Congratulations to her, of course, but in a world where this is possible ... aren't we all winners? (avn.com, Carmen gallery @ nsgalleries.com via kellyfind.com)