We don't know about you, but we think that maps are pretty much the sexiest thing in the whole world—especially if they are the whole world! Nothing gets us going like a couple of nice round color-coded orbs or maybe a topographical elevation chart with major landmarks indicated by little gold stars. Man, our computer monitor is fogging up just thinking about fingering our Rand McNally! Luckily, we've finally found two girls who clearly share our passion for well-drawn borders. Now if only we knew their names or where they were or even what language they speak. How would one go about tracking down a couple of hot and horny geography sluts? Do you think there's a map for that?

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· "Geography makes horny" (RedTube)

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Send an email to Dashiell Bennett, the author of this post, at dashiell@deadspin.com.