"I found an original full head rubber Miss Piggy mask, circa 1977, complete with a full head of long blond hair. I am looking for a tall, sexy BBW, preferably over 300 pounds, to wear this mask to bed. ... who knows - for the right woman I might just get a green rubber suit and a Kermit mask." Won't someone please think of Scooter? (craigslist.org, via Gawker)

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