We ordered you to bring us footage from the vaults of the East German military's secret porn stash ... and fortunately a good and loyal citizen who is not afraid to inform on fellow internet residents has obeyed our wishes. We will be sure to mention this in our report to the commandant. The rest of you should think about your commitment to our glorious state more closely as you check out this Dutch* Danish news report with selected outtakes from the Stasi porn files we mentioned last week. We can't understand a word that's being said (translations are welcome in the comments), but we have learned two things. 1) these films are much better than anything created by a communist-funded propaganda arm should be and 2) Dutch* Danish news programs are way cooler than ours are.

· "Porno i den østtyske sikkerhedstjeneste" (dr.dk - thanks L; *corrected, because we tend to get everyone north of Switzerland confused ... thanks all!)
Previously: East Germany's Military Porn Factory Had Ways Of Making You Fap

Send an email to Dashiell Bennett, the author of this post, at dashiell@deadspin.com.