By Violet Blue, 1:15 PM on Thu Jan 10 2008, 3,802 views (Edit, to draft, Top, Slurp)

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Okay, technically the "us" in the title is only a fraction of the Fleshbot staff, but it happens to be the fraction pressing "publish" right now—with my rock-hard glutes, titanium clit, utterly toned thighs and vagina of steel (patent pending). It's all thanks to the Thigh Exerciser Sex Toy, which has nothing on Fonda or Summers, but everything on us porn bloggers who drool over hot babes all day eating nothing but penis, vagina and anus shaped novelty treats (save the occasional Penis Pasta carb infusion, for which we'll really need to flap our thighs with this thing to work off). Sure, they're all at AEE right now, but I'm working out, though I may accidentally crush my next dildo into dust. Now, if I could just get this thing to shoot a death ray from the ThighMaster housing when I flex, my work here is done.

· Thigh Exerciser Sex Toy (homemade-sex-toys.com)

Previously: Flesh Flicks: Workout Partners, Miss Candy's Domination Training: No Pain, No Gain, Sexercises!